Greetings from oblivion!!
For those of you who don't know the details... I won't bore you with them, but sufficed to say I am currently voluntarily unemployed and pursuing a career as a full-time author. This in part explains the lack of a finale recap and for that I hope you can forgive me.
While we are on the subject, I wanted to do the finale recap in a Q&A style. Giving you A's to all of your unanswered Q's. After experiencing the finale, I can safely say that the answer to almost all of them is, "It doesn't matter because it had nothing to do with the REAL purpose of the island." Having said that, I actually enjoyed the final episode and thought it brought excellent closure for the characters if not the near-impossible "Answer to Everything." On a philosophical level, I think any lingering questions are perhaps more intriguing than the answers themselves. For an exhaustive list, check this out: http://lostpedia.wikia.com/wiki/Unanswered_questions
So in short, I choose to abstain from attempting a finale recap. In part because of the near perfection of the episode itself and in larger part due to being an aforementioned unemployed full-time author. Cop out? Perhaps. I shall leave that as my own little mystery for you to solve. In the meantime, the list of LOST life lessons that I compiled thanks to many of your contributions was completed a while ago, but unfortunately saved to my work PC just before my self-liberation from the workforce. However, after unflagging persistence I have managed to cut through the mass of corporate red tape and am able to present it to you now:
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Everything I Need To Know… I Learned From LOST
- In order to receive a direct answer, you must first ask a direct question.
- Who needs biological children when you can create fake animal-skull babies of your own?
- We either live together or die alone.
- Never attempt to handle dynamite found on a 200-year-old shipwrecked vessel. You’ll likely end up in 100 tiny pieces.
- Don’t take any “medicine” offered by your kidnappers.
- You may think that cute brunette with the penchant for melodrama will one day wake up, get a clue and forget the doctor. But she won't. Get over it. Go after the sassy latin-speaking blonde instead.
- It only ends once. Anything before that is just progress.
- Don’t tell me what I can’t do.
- You can make an entire music career from one catchy line and a bunch of funny accents.
- Go easy on your deadbeat dad, because you never know if one day you may get teleported back in time and find out he wasn't such a bad guy after all.
- If you happen to see a TV news crew at a fried chicken restaurant, eat elsewhere.
- Smoke monsters cannot fly over water. Duh…
- Don't stand too close to people who suddenly have prominent roles, despite the fact you've never heard of them before this week.
- Whatever happened, happened… sort of.
- Even if you were given an alternate reality, you’d still be stuck with the same people.
- There’s always something inside the Virgin Mary that shouldn’t be.
- Always pack an extra pair of underwear in case you spontaneously time travel only to be left naked in the jungle a few hours later.
- Evidently, you can anger land masses.
- Never lie to a samurai.
- If you’re going to stab someone, make sure they don’t speak to you first.
- Always bring a towel along on jungle expeditions. You never know when you might get a little Arzt on you.
- Everyone’s got daddy issues.
- Time travel sucks.
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Thank you all for taking this little journey with me. And if you'd like to follow me on my new travels as an author (riddled with its own share of overanalysis of the unknown) friend me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter @HayFiction. Website coming soon! Dude... I'm so "e" it's ridiculous.
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