Don't drive too fast or you'll miss the sign. What sign, you ask? The sign that says:
"Welcome to Paradox Town"
Population: 0
Main Export: Craziness
Town Motto: "Whatever Happened Schmappened"
Sister City: Dharmaville
Egads! Definitely didn't see that coming. I knew that Sayid wasn't going to take Ben with him, simply because we know from Season 3 that Ben is supposed to remain with the Dharma Initiative well into his young adult life when he allows the Hostiles to infiltrate the barracks while he carts his dad up to a secluded part of the jungle and gasses him too.
The obvious question of course, does all of that still "happen" if young Ben truly is dead? Unless they're going to toss Faraday's blathering about the rules out the window, then young Ben's body is going to have to be discovered and resuscitated by the Dharma folks or the Island, itself, will have to "bring him back" just like it did Locke and presumably Jack's dad.
Whatever happened happened... unless you're Desmond because a different set of rules apply to him... oh yeah, and if you want to kill someone who is supposed to be alive in the future, then a third set of rules factor in... or if you wanted to travel to the day you were born and shoot yourself between the eyes, just for kicks, we've got you covered because then there's a FOURTH set of rules that absolutely CANNOT be broken... we're serious... unless you buy us a pizza... then we'll let you assassinate just about anybody you want.
What I'm really hoping is that young Ben will either naturally or miraculously survive the gunshot, because if he doesn't, in the immortal words of Ricky Ricardo, "You have some splain'in to do, Lucy."
Sorry for the long intro before the recap, but I just had to get that off my chest. I'll try to keep the rest short and sweet. Like the Sweet 16 of March Madness... (how's THAT for a transition?):
Here are the brackets.
ROUND 1:
Sawyer vs Sayid
This round goes to Sayid, hands down. He's not interested in the trumped up story that Sawyer has to offer and he ain't budgin'.
Adult Ben vs Widmore
Ben wins this one. Presumably the Russian was the last of Widmore's people that he wanted Sayid to kill and he's done with him, just like that.
Kate vs Jack
Jack knew about Sawyer and Juliet's relationship, but didn't share it with Kate. Big deal. She's supposedly over him anyway, right? Jack wins by unfair advantage.
ROUND 2:
Hurley vs Jack
But then Jack is immediately wiped out by Hurley in round two with Hurley's hilarious comment "They live together like not as roommates," followed by "I could totally see that coming."
Roger Linus (Ben's Dad) vs Sayid
I have to give this one to Sayid.
Roger: "You guys are supposed to be kings of the jungle and you got caught by these Dharma idiots?"
Sayid: "Yet you're the one mopping their floors."
BOOYAH!
Roger vs Young Ben
Roger then turns his anger towards an easier target, his own son. Victory for Roger, but a hollow one. I forgot how much Ben hated him.
ROUND 3:
Adult Ben vs Sayid
Ben tracks Sayid down and tries to convince him that Locke was murdered by Widmore's people in "retribution" for their past actions and that Hurley may be next if he does not "intervene." Sayid won't take the bait, but as we know he does actually bust Hurley out of the psych ward shortly after this, so we'll call it a draw.
Sawyer vs Sayid
Round three rematch between Sawyer and Sayid goes to Sawyer, but only because he was armed with a taser.
Oldham (Dharma torture guy) vs Sayid
Sayid finally eeks out a win this round. However, only on a technicality. For all intents and purposes, Oldham got the information he needed, it was just too crazy to be believed.
ROUND 4:
Kate vs Juliet
Not nearly the cat fight that the deviously edited preview had me believe. Strained civility, more like. Juliet is friendly, but still able to work the phrase "stay away" into conversation to make her point. Clever girl. Juliet wins. (Note: Juliet not only wins the conversation, but would have also won had it been a wrestling match, a spelling bee, or a best-hair competition.)
Everyone vs Sawyer
Sorry, Sawyer. You were outvoted. Sayid's goin' down.
Sayid vs Ilana
Sorry, Sayid. You were outsmarted. Nice boots, Ilana.
ROUND 5:
Sawyer vs Sayid
Final showdown between the two goes to Sayid who turns down Sawyer's offer of escape, saying he's there for a reason.
Sawyer vs Kate
Sawyer asks Kate about her own reasons for returning, but mum's the word. You win for now, Kate, but I'm sure we'll see your reasons soon enough, just as we saw Sayid's.
Sayid vs Jin
I wonder if Jin was really going to warn Sawyer over the radio or not. Either way, Sayid wins again.
FINAL ROUND:
Sayid vs Young Ben
We all know the outcome of this. Young Ben loses after a potentially fatal gunshot wound to the chest... or does he? For now, we are unsure of his fate. If he survives, the victory goes to him and Sayid loses. If he dies, EVERYONE loses because that, my friends, is a paradox. And when it comes to F-ing with time like that... nobody is a winner.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
S5E9 - Namaste
Happy Belated St. Patrick’s Day…
If four-leaf clovers were turned into a rating system against which to measure episodes, I’d give this one two leaves. I don’t know, just kind of ho-hum, don’t you think?
Unfortunately, the only Irish-American actor in the cast, Terry O’Quinn (born Terrance Quinn), is not featured in this episode so I will have to assign an Irish alter-ego for the other characters…
Jack McShephard
If the island has a “reason” why everyone had to return, it has yet to show its hand. I feel like Jack, Kate, and Hurley were just dumped in the past and there’s a sense of, “Okay, now what?” Jack, of course, hopped on board the destiny train presumably to “protect” everyone, so must feel pretty out of sorts now that he’s back to see that everyone’s fine and dandy. Oh, and he’s now a janitor with a degree in spinal surgery. That probably sucks too.
Caitlin Austen
I thought for a moment that Juliet intentionally left Kate off the sub’s manifest. Who knows, she could have seriously considered it. Definitely potential for tension there. Kate must feel out of sorts too, but it seems like her main focus is to get Aaron back (if, presumably, that is why she decided to return).
Hugo “O’Hurley” Reyes
Same thing with Hurley. I feel like he and Kate, especially, are in a holding pattern motivation-wise until we find out why they decided to come back.
James Ford
(known to some LOSTies as “Sawyer”)
(known to the Dharma Initiative as “LaFleur”)
(known to his Irish mother as “Jimmy Flanagan”)
Sawyer had to think quick on his feet to slip his three friends in unnoticed. I thought it was especially harsh what he said to Jack about how when Jack was in charge a lot of people died. Anyway, I don’t blame Jack for showing up at his house with questions. Traveling back in time and living with the Dharma Initiative for three years definitely warrants at least a catch up chat. One of the most interesting things he mentioned in this episode was how Faraday was no longer with them. I’m looking forward to seeing what happened to him.
Sayid Fitzpatrick Jarrah
Unfortunately, Sawyer’s quick thinking couldn’t quite save Sayid, though he’s at least safe for now. I’m also assuming Sayid has figured out by now that they’re in the past, especially after meeting young Ben, which was perhaps the only surprise of the episode and one I kind of figured would come at some point anyway considering Ben grew up during the Dharma Initiative. Of course, the time travel again bothers me because surely Ben is old enough at that point to remember these people that he’s meeting. Then again Ben is very mysterious and deceptive so it wouldn’t surprise me if he has always remembered Sayid or any of the other LOSTies and has known all along that they were “destined” to be in his past/future.
Sun McKwon
So, it is confirmed that the rest of the plane survivors are indeed in “the present.” Which begs the question of why did only certain people go back in time, but for now I’ll chalk that up to the “unpredictability” that Eloise warned them of. Very funny when Sun finally knocked out Ben, which we knew would happen since we saw Locke discover him mixed in with all the other hurt or unconscious crash survivors. Good for her for not trusting him. But just what exactly is she supposed to do now? The picture Christian showed her bugs me. If I understand how time travel “works,” that picture should have been there since the 70s, therefore when some of the LOSTies followed Locke to live in the abandoned Dharma barracks, there were plenty of opportunities for someone to have seen it. Are we just to believe that no one happened to notice a picture with Jack, Kate, and Hurley hanging on a wall dated 1977? Sheesh. Anyway, I suppose Christian will help her travel through time to rejoin everyone? Double sheesh.
Not much else to say. Wasn’t wild about the episode to tell you the truth. Just sets up an awful lot of tension for Jack/Sawyer, Kate/Juliet, Sayid/Dharma and not to mention sets up whatever crazy stuff Sun/Frank will have to do to “go back” if that’s what they need to do.
Ho-hum.
If four-leaf clovers were turned into a rating system against which to measure episodes, I’d give this one two leaves. I don’t know, just kind of ho-hum, don’t you think?
Unfortunately, the only Irish-American actor in the cast, Terry O’Quinn (born Terrance Quinn), is not featured in this episode so I will have to assign an Irish alter-ego for the other characters…
Jack McShephard
If the island has a “reason” why everyone had to return, it has yet to show its hand. I feel like Jack, Kate, and Hurley were just dumped in the past and there’s a sense of, “Okay, now what?” Jack, of course, hopped on board the destiny train presumably to “protect” everyone, so must feel pretty out of sorts now that he’s back to see that everyone’s fine and dandy. Oh, and he’s now a janitor with a degree in spinal surgery. That probably sucks too.
Caitlin Austen
I thought for a moment that Juliet intentionally left Kate off the sub’s manifest. Who knows, she could have seriously considered it. Definitely potential for tension there. Kate must feel out of sorts too, but it seems like her main focus is to get Aaron back (if, presumably, that is why she decided to return).
Hugo “O’Hurley” Reyes
Same thing with Hurley. I feel like he and Kate, especially, are in a holding pattern motivation-wise until we find out why they decided to come back.
James Ford
(known to some LOSTies as “Sawyer”)
(known to the Dharma Initiative as “LaFleur”)
(known to his Irish mother as “Jimmy Flanagan”)
Sawyer had to think quick on his feet to slip his three friends in unnoticed. I thought it was especially harsh what he said to Jack about how when Jack was in charge a lot of people died. Anyway, I don’t blame Jack for showing up at his house with questions. Traveling back in time and living with the Dharma Initiative for three years definitely warrants at least a catch up chat. One of the most interesting things he mentioned in this episode was how Faraday was no longer with them. I’m looking forward to seeing what happened to him.
Sayid Fitzpatrick Jarrah
Unfortunately, Sawyer’s quick thinking couldn’t quite save Sayid, though he’s at least safe for now. I’m also assuming Sayid has figured out by now that they’re in the past, especially after meeting young Ben, which was perhaps the only surprise of the episode and one I kind of figured would come at some point anyway considering Ben grew up during the Dharma Initiative. Of course, the time travel again bothers me because surely Ben is old enough at that point to remember these people that he’s meeting. Then again Ben is very mysterious and deceptive so it wouldn’t surprise me if he has always remembered Sayid or any of the other LOSTies and has known all along that they were “destined” to be in his past/future.
Sun McKwon
So, it is confirmed that the rest of the plane survivors are indeed in “the present.” Which begs the question of why did only certain people go back in time, but for now I’ll chalk that up to the “unpredictability” that Eloise warned them of. Very funny when Sun finally knocked out Ben, which we knew would happen since we saw Locke discover him mixed in with all the other hurt or unconscious crash survivors. Good for her for not trusting him. But just what exactly is she supposed to do now? The picture Christian showed her bugs me. If I understand how time travel “works,” that picture should have been there since the 70s, therefore when some of the LOSTies followed Locke to live in the abandoned Dharma barracks, there were plenty of opportunities for someone to have seen it. Are we just to believe that no one happened to notice a picture with Jack, Kate, and Hurley hanging on a wall dated 1977? Sheesh. Anyway, I suppose Christian will help her travel through time to rejoin everyone? Double sheesh.
Not much else to say. Wasn’t wild about the episode to tell you the truth. Just sets up an awful lot of tension for Jack/Sawyer, Kate/Juliet, Sayid/Dharma and not to mention sets up whatever crazy stuff Sun/Frank will have to do to “go back” if that’s what they need to do.
Ho-hum.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
S5E8 - LaFleur
There seemed to be a lot of good news/bad news in this episode so I shall recap in kind.
Good News:
Congrats, Losties… NO MORE TIME TRAVEL! Woohoo!
Bad News:
You’re stuck in the 1970s. Here’s your complimentary Steely Dan cassette tape. Enjoy.
Even though I am happy to report that Locke’s efforts unstuck the analogous “record of time”, the result is not much better as it pertains to potential problems. The Losties are now stuck in the past, meaning they could set off a chain of events that unwittingly alter their own histories. But, Daniel puts an overly simple spin on it saying, “Whatever happened, happened” meaning there’s nothing they can do to create a paradox because “time won’t allow it.” I’m saving myself the headache and just swallowing that whole.
Good News:
It’s a lovely day for a picnic.
Bad News:
It’s also a lovely day to shoot you and your husband.
Seriously, what’s up with that? So much for whatever “truce” agreement the others (aka Richard’s people) and the Dharma Initiative had. It seems to me that Richard’s men are the one’s that broke the truce. They shot chica’s husband and looked ready to do her the same. How is it that Richard’s people need “justice” when their men were the ones in the wrong? And, how is that taking her husband’s dead body makes them even?
Good News:
You’re sonic fence is great for keeping out unwanted people and critters.
Bad News:
It doesn’t work on zombies.
I’m not too far from kidding when I ask… Is Richard and Friends all zombies? Is that why the fence “doesn’t work” on them? Is that why he’s permanently young? Is that why they think it’s cool to collect dead bodies… to grow their zombie numbers? I mean, it’s not like death is permanent on the island anyway (ie.. Christian and Locke). Also, if the fence doesn’t work on them, then why did Richard have to “convince” young Ben back in the day to deactivate the fence so his people could come in and kill everyone? Did they up the ampage and that’s what did it? Oh yeah, AND if Richard and Friends truly are the “natives” then are they the ones responsible for building that gigantic four-toed statue (first seen at the end of Season Two and last seen last night). Anyway… WEIRD.
Good News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for two weeks to find our people.
Bad News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for three years to find our people.
Talk about commitment. Needless to say, I’m curious about how two weeks turned into three years. I mean, I understand that the O6 – Aaron + Locke + Ben just hadn’t showed up yet so they kept at it, but you’d think eventually they’d say, “Well, we tried,” and move on. I feel like there’s a lot of new potential flashback material in these past 3 years. Off the top of my head is Daniel’s to-be warning to little Charlotte about the island. It happened according to Charlotte and in Daniel’s own words, “What happened, happened,” so he obviously will warn her and the mother despite his weak mumbling at the beginning of this episode to the contrary.
Good News:
You’re a daddy.
Bad News:
You missed it.
This is the verbatim good news/bad news that Sawyer gave Horace. Again, I hope we get to see peeks into how everyone’s “relationship” with the Dharma Initiative developed over the past three years. Apparently Sawyer (aka Jim LaFleur, which I found hilarious), Miles, and Jin (speaking fluent English these days) work security detail. Daniel (who wasn’t around much this episode) apparently works construction and perhaps with the science team according to the brief clip of him we saw in the Orchid Station at the beginning of the season. And Juliet becomes a… wait for it… mechanic (a surprisingly far cry from my midwife idea).
Speaking of which, apparently whatever happened (or in this case will happen) to cause the pregnancy issues, hasn’t happened yet. The obvious question, just what will happen to cause that issue? Here’s an idea… HOW ABOUT THAT NUCLEAR BOMB YOU NUMBSKULLS BURIED? Radiation poisoning, anyone? Unfortunately, I bet it will have something to do with time travel. Maybe Daniel will do something funky at the Orchid Station to catapult the Losties back to the “present” when the Ajira flight landed and it lays a permanent pregger-voodoo on everyone in the past. Kind of like a benign version of the time sickness, except deadly to embryos.
Good News:
Jin found Jack and Hurley!
Bad News:
He also found Kate.
I guess we’ll find out if 3 years really is long enough to get over someone or not. Poor Juliet. She dug on Jack then backed off because she figured he liked Kate, then she off and develops a seemingly stable long-term relationship with Sawyer who—oops!—also maybe still digs on Kate. I mean, Kate’s easy on the eyes, but come on… looks AND personality…? Juliet, hands down.
Good News:
Eloise is a wiz at math…
Bad News:
Give or take 30 years…
I’m guessing that in the prior episode when Ilana and Caesar referred to the passengers like Hurley “disappearing” it was because they went back in time while everyone else on Ajira landed in “the present.” Fine. But why didn’t that happen to Locke, Ben, Frank, and maybe Sun? Can the island “choose” where/when people go based on what it wants? Lame-O. Even a watered-down Faraday analogy would be better than that. I hope we get one. Oh wait, maybe this was the “unpredictable” factor that Eloise warned would happen if ALL of them didn’t return. Aaron didn’t come with, nor did Walt or Desmond if they’re included in the mix. Perhaps them not being on the plane made the return go a little wonky and some folks wound up in the past instead of the present. Whatever. Even though time travel has stopped, its suckiness lingers on.
Good News:
Congrats, Losties… NO MORE TIME TRAVEL! Woohoo!
Bad News:
You’re stuck in the 1970s. Here’s your complimentary Steely Dan cassette tape. Enjoy.
Even though I am happy to report that Locke’s efforts unstuck the analogous “record of time”, the result is not much better as it pertains to potential problems. The Losties are now stuck in the past, meaning they could set off a chain of events that unwittingly alter their own histories. But, Daniel puts an overly simple spin on it saying, “Whatever happened, happened” meaning there’s nothing they can do to create a paradox because “time won’t allow it.” I’m saving myself the headache and just swallowing that whole.
Good News:
It’s a lovely day for a picnic.
Bad News:
It’s also a lovely day to shoot you and your husband.
Seriously, what’s up with that? So much for whatever “truce” agreement the others (aka Richard’s people) and the Dharma Initiative had. It seems to me that Richard’s men are the one’s that broke the truce. They shot chica’s husband and looked ready to do her the same. How is it that Richard’s people need “justice” when their men were the ones in the wrong? And, how is that taking her husband’s dead body makes them even?
Good News:
You’re sonic fence is great for keeping out unwanted people and critters.
Bad News:
It doesn’t work on zombies.
I’m not too far from kidding when I ask… Is Richard and Friends all zombies? Is that why the fence “doesn’t work” on them? Is that why he’s permanently young? Is that why they think it’s cool to collect dead bodies… to grow their zombie numbers? I mean, it’s not like death is permanent on the island anyway (ie.. Christian and Locke). Also, if the fence doesn’t work on them, then why did Richard have to “convince” young Ben back in the day to deactivate the fence so his people could come in and kill everyone? Did they up the ampage and that’s what did it? Oh yeah, AND if Richard and Friends truly are the “natives” then are they the ones responsible for building that gigantic four-toed statue (first seen at the end of Season Two and last seen last night). Anyway… WEIRD.
Good News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for two weeks to find our people.
Bad News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for three years to find our people.
Talk about commitment. Needless to say, I’m curious about how two weeks turned into three years. I mean, I understand that the O6 – Aaron + Locke + Ben just hadn’t showed up yet so they kept at it, but you’d think eventually they’d say, “Well, we tried,” and move on. I feel like there’s a lot of new potential flashback material in these past 3 years. Off the top of my head is Daniel’s to-be warning to little Charlotte about the island. It happened according to Charlotte and in Daniel’s own words, “What happened, happened,” so he obviously will warn her and the mother despite his weak mumbling at the beginning of this episode to the contrary.
Good News:
You’re a daddy.
Bad News:
You missed it.
This is the verbatim good news/bad news that Sawyer gave Horace. Again, I hope we get to see peeks into how everyone’s “relationship” with the Dharma Initiative developed over the past three years. Apparently Sawyer (aka Jim LaFleur, which I found hilarious), Miles, and Jin (speaking fluent English these days) work security detail. Daniel (who wasn’t around much this episode) apparently works construction and perhaps with the science team according to the brief clip of him we saw in the Orchid Station at the beginning of the season. And Juliet becomes a… wait for it… mechanic (a surprisingly far cry from my midwife idea).
Speaking of which, apparently whatever happened (or in this case will happen) to cause the pregnancy issues, hasn’t happened yet. The obvious question, just what will happen to cause that issue? Here’s an idea… HOW ABOUT THAT NUCLEAR BOMB YOU NUMBSKULLS BURIED? Radiation poisoning, anyone? Unfortunately, I bet it will have something to do with time travel. Maybe Daniel will do something funky at the Orchid Station to catapult the Losties back to the “present” when the Ajira flight landed and it lays a permanent pregger-voodoo on everyone in the past. Kind of like a benign version of the time sickness, except deadly to embryos.
Good News:
Jin found Jack and Hurley!
Bad News:
He also found Kate.
I guess we’ll find out if 3 years really is long enough to get over someone or not. Poor Juliet. She dug on Jack then backed off because she figured he liked Kate, then she off and develops a seemingly stable long-term relationship with Sawyer who—oops!—also maybe still digs on Kate. I mean, Kate’s easy on the eyes, but come on… looks AND personality…? Juliet, hands down.
Good News:
Eloise is a wiz at math…
Bad News:
Give or take 30 years…
I’m guessing that in the prior episode when Ilana and Caesar referred to the passengers like Hurley “disappearing” it was because they went back in time while everyone else on Ajira landed in “the present.” Fine. But why didn’t that happen to Locke, Ben, Frank, and maybe Sun? Can the island “choose” where/when people go based on what it wants? Lame-O. Even a watered-down Faraday analogy would be better than that. I hope we get one. Oh wait, maybe this was the “unpredictable” factor that Eloise warned would happen if ALL of them didn’t return. Aaron didn’t come with, nor did Walt or Desmond if they’re included in the mix. Perhaps them not being on the plane made the return go a little wonky and some folks wound up in the past instead of the present. Whatever. Even though time travel has stopped, its suckiness lingers on.
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