S5E16/17 - The Incident

First, I'd like to thank my unborn child for remaining unborn and making this recap possible.

Okay, so where to begin? I suppose when it doubt, begin in the beginning.

(LOST 5: 1-5)
IN THE BEGINNING... there was Jacob. And some dude sat with Jacob.
The dude obviously hated Jacob and wanted to kill him, but couldn't for some reason.
And Jacob said, "Let's have some fish," and there was fish.
Jacob cut the fish and saw it was good, and he separated the light meat from the dark meat.
And the Black Rock moved upon the face of the waters.

Jacob's conversation with his... er.... "nemesis" was the most revealing yet confusing. Anti-Jacob wants to kill Jacob, but can't. Anti-Jacob suggests Jacob brought the Black Rock to the island, adding that no matter who comes the same thing happens over and over, but he will find a loophole so he can kill Jacob.

Dare I even speculate what all this means? I will only say that their relationship seems akin to Ben and Widmore where the two men detest each other, yet Ben himself commented how he could not kill Widmore because that was "against the rules."

(LOST 5: 6-8)
AND KATE SAID, "Let there be an expanse of water to separate the LOSTies from the LOSTies."
So Kate hopped the sub and convinced Juliet to move from the waters below to the island above. And Sawyer protested, but Juliet insisted. And it was so.
Kate called it, "Saving innocent people," and Sawyer called it, "Acting a fool."

So, Kate pseudo-convinces Sawyer and Juliet to tag along back to the island to prevent Jack from detonating the bomb. Good luck with that.

In the meantime, Jacob visits little Katie in the past and pays for a lunchbox she stole, telling her not to steal again. Not only that, but throughout the episode, Jacob pops up in all of the LOSTies lives in a very benevolent-but-non-intrusive kind of way. Gives Sawyer condolences and a pen. Asks Sayid for directions, allowing/observing Nadia get hit by a car. Revives Locke after his eight-story fall and tells him everything is going to be okay. Gives Jack a candy bar. Offers Hurley a cab ride, a guitar, and a sympathetic ear. Asks Ilana to help him while she's recuperating in the hospital (more on that next season, I assume?)

(LOST 5: 9-13)
AND ILANA SAID, "Let me and my shadow gang gather in one place." And it was so.
And Ilana called Frank a "candidate." And Frank wondered if it was good.
Then Ilana said, "Let us visit Jacob in his shack," but the shack was empty so she said, "Burn it." And they did burn it.
And they traveled to the statue. And Ilana asked Richard, who is called Ricardos, "What lies in the shadow of the statue?"
And he answered in Latin. And his answer was good.

I found two varying translations of his answer, one was, "He who will save us all," and another was, "That which must be protected." Regardless of the translation, I think a better answer would have been, "Fruit of the loom." Seriously, what an odd hobby for Jacob to pass the time. Tapestry making.

(LOST 5: 14-19)
AND JACK SAID, "Let us take the bomb to the Swan station that we might detonate it and erase our experience of the past seasons and days and years."
And Sayid became an expert physicist in only a few short minutes thanks to Faraday's journal titled: Nuclear Engineering For Dummies.
And lo did Richard make a hole in the wall, which lead to Dharmaville.
And Sayid said, "Let us hide in plain sight." So they donned Dharma uniforms and tried to sneak away.
But they were discovered. A shootout commenced and Jack killed many.
Though a mortal wound did Sayid suffer.

Or did he? It was looking pretty bleak for Sayid by the end of the episode, but who knows what repercussions the bomb will have on them. I'm specifically hoping it is able to save Juliet. Seriously, that was painful to watch. Physical and emotional. Her parting with Sawyer was tender and tragic and then, severely wounded, she still has the energy to bash the bomb over and over with a rock, pleading for it to detonate.

My theory is that they CANNOT prevent their past (the future) from happening. The Whatever Happened Happened rule is intact. So if by some action on their part, they alter something, they will essentially be "thrown out" of the past because a new time line cannot be created. I'm just grasping at straws, really, but I desperately want the last season to be set in the present and for everyone to be reunited.

Sidenote, did anyone notice that Dr. Chang's hand was crushed? Remember in the Dharma training videos how Dr. Chang has a prosthetic hand and refers to himself as Marvin Candle? Well, I can't account for the name-change, but looks like we discovered how he lost his hand!

(LOST 5: 20-23)
AND LOCKE SAID UNTO BEN, "Kill Jacob."
And Ben said, "Whaaa?"
So it came to pass that Locke planted seeds of anger in Ben's head. And the seeds fell on fertile ground.
And Jacob said unto Ben, "You have a choice." And lo did Ben make his choice and take Jacob's life.

Jacob seems very... I don't know... almost God-like or perhaps angelic is a better term. It's just the whole benevolent bystander thing. Like he isn't allowed to be directly involved with the LOSTies (either by causing or preventing bad things in their past), but he seems genuinely sympathetic and not to mention gave Hurley and Ben a big speech about free will. I don't know... just an observation.

(LOST 5: 24-26)
AND SAWYER ASKED, "What is this place we have come to?" And Vincent answered, "RUFF!"
So it came to pass that we saw the fate of Rose and Bernard, retired to a love shack for the past three years.
And they ruled over the fish of the sea and birds of the air, over the livestock, and over a leftover can of Dharma food here and there.

Yay Rose and Bernard! With all of their talk about being together was all that mattered, I wonder if their bodies are the ones that Jack discovered in the cave in Season One. Though them joining forces with or being brainwashed by the Others would have been a crazy twist, I'm happy that they're happy. Rose rules.

(LOST 5: 27-31)
SO IT CAME TO PASS that Ilana opened the crate in the presence of Richard and lo did it contain the dead body of John Locke.
So Anti-Jacob created himself in Locke's own image, in the image of Locke he created himself to decieve all.
And Jacob said unto Anti-Jacob, "So I guess you found your loophole." And lo was his final words, "They're coming."
Anti-Jacob rolled Jacob into the fire and saw all that he wrought, and it was very good.
And they all rested... until season six.

So the big reveal. LOCKE IS STILL DEAD! Funny how a dead person remaining dead is a surprise twist. Apparently Anti-Jacob has disguised himself as Locke somehow, just like the island is able to assume the form of any dead person. Which brings up the question, is that what all of the "hallucinations" of people have been up to this point? Anti-Jacob trying to trick them? Can Jacob perform this "trick" as well? There are far too many examples to list where a dead person or Walt has appeared to people so it's difficult to sort them all out and the potential motivations behind them. But the short story seems to be that EVERYONE has been a pawn in this cat and mouse game between Jacob and his nemesis. The details of which, I'm assuming we'll discover next year.

Will Sayid die?
Will Juliet die?
Will the bomb somehow bring the LOSTies back to the present?
Who is Anti-Jacob?
Who are the Shadow people?
How does Widmore factor in to any of this?

Plenty of other questions, but those are the biggest I have after the finale.

Thoughts? Observations?

Season Six can't come soon enough.

S5E15 - Follow The Leader

Well, gee. This episode didn’t do much for me. Perhaps because there was such great potential with the promise of a Richard flashback, and we didn’t learn jack squat from him.

Since Jack seems to be back on his “fixing” things kick, he’s bound and determined to carry out Faraday’s plan. To do that, he may have to wade through some of the recently deceased’s physics journal. Not exactly a light read. So, in an effort to help Jack, I will distill this episode into a collection of simple equations.

(Daniel / Richard) = (Eloise – Daniel) = Bummer
That’s right Ellie, you kilt yo baby.

(Jack + Kate) = (Eloise / Widmore) = Drama
Ellie and Charles don’t agree on what to do with Jack and Kate. The one thing I don’t know is whether or not Ellie has given birth to Daniel yet in 1977. If not, I guess she will soon enough.

(Jack + Eloise) = (Jack / Kate) = Squabble
Once Jack convinces Ellie to lead them to the bomb, Kate is dead set against it. Can’t say that I blame her. I mean seriously, what does he think will happen when he does that? And what’s supposed to happen to them if he is successful in preventing their plane crash? Arghh—TIME TRAVEL! Must you suck so?

(Radzinsky + Phil) / Sawyer = Beat Down
Meanwhile in the present, Sawyer finally offers to tell the Dharma folks what they want to know about the Others if he and Juliet are allowed to leave on the sub.

The Others * (Locke + Ben + Sun) = Boar
Always nice for the new president to treat everyone to dinner after a corporate take over. Richard is surprised to see Locke after his three-year absence. There doesn’t seem to be a new leader so I suppose either Jacob or the Island never called for a replacement. It begs the question of exactly what they’ve been doing since Locke disappeared. Seems to me like they’ve just been waiting around for him to return, so why should Richard be surprised?

(Locke + Richard + Ben) = The Three Stooges
I kept wondering aloud how Locke knew this was the time he jumped to when he was shot and Richard saved him. His answer? The Island told him. Well great news. But then (and I’m speaking directly to Locke when I ask this), why doesn’t the Island tell you where Jacob is so you can go find him, yourself? Seems like the Island isn’t always on the up and up with you. Lovers quarrel? It must be awkward trying to rebuild your relationship after three years of being apart. I think you guys should take it slow in the beginning rather than trying to pick up where you left off. I mean, you did die and come back to life. You’re a different person now and quite frankly, maybe the Island has moved on and gotten to know other Islands while you were gone. You can’t expect it to wait on you forever, you know.

(Jin + Miles + Hurley) / Chang = Comedy
Pretty funny when Chang confronts them about being from the future and Hurley fails miserably. Miles observes Chang ordering his wife off the island and realizes it was the only way he could make her leave. So, Chang isn’t a d-bag after all.

((Jack + Kate) + (Eloise + Richard + Other Dude)) / Sayid = (Jack – Kate) + ((Eloise / Richard) – Other Dude) = Sayonara Kate = RIP Other Dude
Richard is none too happy that Ellie is going along with Jack’s crazy idea, especially after Sayid kills one of their own. Sayid is all in for fixing the past/future while Kate has had enough.

((Jack + Sayid) + (Eloise + Richard)) * Bomb = ??
I believe Ellie summed it up best when they finally made it to the bomb. “Now what?” If the Whatever Happened Happened principle still holds true, Jack won’t be successful. And I hope he isn’t, for my sanity’s sake.

(Locke + The Others) = (Locke / Jacob) = Fieldtrip
So Locke rallies the troupes, so to speak, and says they’re all going to visit the mysterious Jacob to get some answers. Meanwhile, Sun asks if Jacob can tell them how to bring everyone back to the present and he says yes. Then, come to find out he has no intention of being reunited with the LOSTies and in fact plans on killing Jacob. Well now… Don’t get me wrong, I’m digging Locke’s rediscovered backbone, however, he seems to be playing an awful lot of Ben-like games now that he’s “in direct contact” with the Island.

Next week is the finale and it promises to be good if we discover nothing more than who/what Jacob is.

S5E14 - The Variable

While May 10th marks Mother’s Day this year, this episode begs to celebrate it a touch early. That, plus our second child is due the day after Mother’s Day with the finale coming two days after that and quite frankly, I’m thinking number two will be making its appearance before this season is over and I can’t have such a good theme go to waste…

FINALLY! Someone on this show with mommy issues instead of daddy issues. And boy howdy does he have a bad case.

Exhibit A:
ELOISE: “Hi Danny, it looks like you’re really enjoying the piano.”
DANIEL: “Oh yes, Mother, it’s ever so fun.”
ELOISE: “Well STOP IT!”
DANIEL: “But Mother…”
ELOISE: “No! Go do some math problems.”

Doesn’t Eloise know that math and music are closely related? Geez, give the kid a break. To her “credit” you can see the pain in her eyes. Who knows, he could have been a world renowned concert pianist or at the very least a popular wedding singer on the weekends. Alas, we’ll never know.

Meanwhile on the island, crazy Faraday tries to warn Chang that they’re all gonna blow sky-high in 6 hours. Oh, and admits he’s from the future and introduces him to his son. Smooth move, dimwit.

Exhibit B:
ELOISE: “About time you graduated.”
DANIEL: “Mom, this is Theresa.”
ELOISE: “Yeah yeah… let’s eat lunch.”
DANIEL: “Table for three?”
ELOISE: “Fat chance. The hussy stays behind.”

So, we see Daniel’s assistant, Theresa, in a non-coma state. Since Eloise has been known to time travel herself (as evidenced from her warning to Desmond back in season 3) perhaps she knew of Theresa’s fate so was trying to do Daniel a favor to spare him the pain of the accident that would put her in a vegetative state and make him an official denizen of Crazytown. Either that, or she was just being a B!TCH.

Exhibit C:
ELOISE: “No matter what, remember I will always love you.”

The inscription she wrote in his journal was poignant considering she knew she was/would be responsible for his death. She must have run out of ink before she could add: “P.S. For instance, like if I shoot you or something.”

Meanwhile, Sawyer introduces Jack to the bound and gagged Phil, “Jack, Phil. Phil, Jack” then has a group meeting with the other LOSTies to decide what to do next. A) Leave on the sub? B) Start over at the beach? Faraday comes in and offers a third option. C) Help me find my mommy?

Exhibit D:
ELOISE: “Hey, I know I’ve pushed and pushed you for years into this career path that is ultimately responsible for making you crazy, and I’ve been thinking recently, why stop there?”
DANIEL: “What? Huh? I’m crazy.”
ELOISE: “Yes, Dear, we’ve covered that. Completely my fault. So, you should take your dad—uh—Mr. Widmore up on his offer.”
DANIEL: “Will it make you proud?”
ELOISE: “Sure. Why not?”

You could almost believe she wanted him to go to the island so that he would be healed. Alas… not so much.

Meanwhile Jack and Kate manage to survive a gunfight and smuggle Faraday out to the others only to discover his plan is to blow up the Swan station with the H-Bomb he asked them to bury. So, what? Faraday is off his Whatever Happened Happened kick? There would be some serious Back-To-The-Future-Disappearing-Marty-McFly action going on if he, or anyone for that matter, were to prevent the hatch from being built. If the “energy” is eliminated, then there is no button to push, then Oceanic 316 lands safely in Los Angeles, then none of them would ever be on the island, meaning they wouldn’t be there “now”. I like my TV and all, but I have no problems throwing a brick at it if they cause a paradox. Oh geez, what if that’s what “the incident” is that messes up the island baby-wise?

Exhibit E:
ELOISE: “What up, Charles?”
CHARLES: “Nothin’. Just chillin’ like a villain. Checkin’ on my son-in-law.”
ELOISE: “He’s fine. Can’t say the same for your biological son, though.”
CHARLES: “Yeah, bummer about that.”
ELOISE: “I know. They grow up so fast.”
CHARLES: “Don’t they?”
ELOISE: “Then they travel back in time.”
CHARLES: “Yeah.”
ELOISE: “Then you shoot them.”
CHARLES: “Kids, right? God love ‘em.”

Okay, so maybe MAYBE Eloise was a little more conflicted about sending Daniel back than that. But still… SHE SENT HIM BACK! Knowing what she knows it begs the question... did him being killed serve some higher purpose or did she just believe “it was his destiny”? At the very least, Daniel deserves a refund on all the Mother’s Day Hallmark cards he wasted on that woman. And of course there is the big reveal that Widmore is Daniel’s father (called it!). Of course we still don’t know who Penny’s mother is, but I’m assuming not Eloise since Ben accused Charles of having a child with an off-islander a few episodes ago. Who knows when anything happened, though, with the gaps in flashbacks. I’m sure the holes will be filled soon enough.

All and all an okay episode. Sad that Daniel is no longer with us, though.

DANIEL FARADAY
R.I.P.
Born 1978
Died 1977
“Time Travel Sucks”

S5E13 - Some Like It Hoth

Well, tax season has come and gone (unless you're filing for an extension and seriously... who does that?) So, let's all breathe a collective sigh of relief as we wait for our check or auto-deposit to roll in (or shed a collective tear if you owe). This is the first year my wife and I have EVER owed and frankly, I don't want to talk about it.

What I do want to talk about is LOST. And a tax theme seems as good as any...

W-2
Talk about someone avoiding the IRS. I wonder exactly what Miles would enter as his occupation and primary form of income: "Spiritual Communication Liaison." The work seems to be sporadic, but pays well.

In the opening we see Miles' mother and it is confirmed that "Mr. Chang" is not in the picture. Ahhh... sweet sweet workahol. I wonder if that's why Mrs. Chang ultimately decided to move away, Pierre Chang (aka Marvin Candle) was too dedicated to his work and not his family. Or was it something more sinister? Either way, I thought it was funny how Hurley mentioned the whole Marvin Candle thing (what Chang calls himself in the Dharma orientation videos). I wonder if that will ever be explained or if it's just some silly mini-mystery we'll never know. I say as long as Hurley is the one poking fun at it, I could care less.

1099-MISC
He'll have to claim Widmore's offer of $1.6 million under miscellaneous income. And what a fat paycheck it is. Definitely enough to make him rethink "tracking down a serial killer" after Naomi explained why Widmore wants him. He and Hurley had such great lines in this episode. One of my favorites being early on when Miles tries to explain to Radzinsky why he's there rather than LaFleur. "Uh, I'm in the circle of trust." Not to mention Hurley trying to convince Miles and Chang to get together for beers.

If Miles and Hurley have a LOST spinoff, I'd watch it. I imagine it as a kind of "Lavern And Shirley" meets "The Odd Couple" meets "The Ghost Whisperer" (I'm talking TV goldmine here, people).

1099-G
You have to claim unemployment compensation on your 1099-G and Kate and Sawyer may well be on their way to just that. They've dug themselves into quite a hole, Sawyer especially after knocking out short security dude. What I also liked about that whole sideplot was Jack smoothing things over with Roger, giving Sawyer the heads up, and leaving it at that. Man, you can really tell he's loving not being "the leader" anymore. Just kind of coasting. Like he made it to the island and now he's in vacation mode. It won't be long until we see him lounging in the quad on a hammock sporting a pair of shades and a sunscreened nose. Heck, maybe he'll even rally together a game of volleyball, Dharma vs Hostiles, across the sonic fence.

1099-DIV
Ah, dividend income. Of course no one is playing the stock market in this episode, though Hurley is certainly hoping to cash in on his knowledge of the future in a pretty hilarious way. A revamped version of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back. In yet more hilarious Hurley/Miles banter, Hurley reveals that he talks to dead people too, but when Miles says, "It doesn't work that way," Hurley says, "You're just jealous that my super power is better than yours." Good stuff.

1099-S
Though nobody sold their home in this episode, they were certainly building one, though they likely did not expect it to be used as a permanent residence. That's right, the hatch. With time travel, the possibilities of changing your future are limitless. In this episode alone, Miles could have offed himself as a baby at any point, though of course according to Daniel, that's impossible. I like how Hurley encourages Miles, "Don't you want to hold the mini-you or change your own diaper?" Ha!

Anyway, what Hurley said about the hatch strikes another chord. It's what caused the original Oceanic flight to crash. He could prevent himself from ever coming to the island to begin with by sabotaging construction of the hatch. Of course, once again, Whatever Happened Happened so we know he "can't" do that, but still the temptation must be pretty strong. Sidebar, I'm still looking forward to a Hurley episode and his reasons for returning.

1099-INT
Income from interest. I've got your interest right here. Interest in what Faraday has been up to for the past three years. Even though my initial thought that he defected to the others looks to be incorrect based on him popping out of the sub at the end in full Dharma drag, I'm guessing we'll get to see the details in the next episode!

My other big interest is the folks that grabbed Miles after he accepted Widmore's offer. They asked if he wanted to know "What lies in the shadow of the statue?" Can't help but see the big tie in to what Ilana said in the last episode. Sumpin's goin' on to say da least. At first, I thought maybe Widmore had somehow smuggled Ilana on board Ajira and that's how she knew about the weapons trunk and was so organized or whatever, but these people were clearly not with Widmore and once again mentioned "the war" that's coming. I got a total creepy cult vibe from the dialogue in that scene, too. Anyway, interesting development there.

CHARITABLE DEDUCTIONS
One donation Miles made was towards the end when he gave that random dad his money back. So Miles has a soft spot after all. Well, soft but with an edge. "If you wanted your son to know you loved him, you should have told him while he was alive." Ouch. Daddy issues, anyone? Actually, can you think of ANY character in this show that doesn't have issues with their father?

Jack's Dad? Alcoholic/Adulterer/Dead-ish.
Claire's Dad? (see above).
Jin's Dad? A common fisherman who he has disowned out of shame.
Sun's Dad? A mobster for all intents and purposes.
Kate's Dad? Abuser/Potential molester/Killed by Kate, herself.
Sawyer's Dad? Killed Sawyer's mom when he discovered she'd been seduced and swindled by another man/Killed himself.
Locke's Dad? Con artist/Attempted to kill Locke/Killed by Sawyer thanks to manipulation from Locke, himself.
Ben's Dad? Drunk/Abusive/Gassed to death by Ben, himself.
Sayid's Dad? Forced his kids to kill chickens, which actually constitutes the most functional father-child relationship I can think of, though Sayid wound up torturing people for a living so you gotta wonder...

YOUR FEDERAL RETURN
(-$1,491)

ABILITY TO TALK TO DEAD PEOPLE
($1,000 – $1,600,000) a pop

TIME BONDING WITH YOUR DEAD FATHER IN THE PAST
(Priceless)

After all of this I'm left with one question... what would Miles and Hurley's spinoff be called?

S5E12 - Dead Is Dead

Easter is this weekend and goes right along with this episode seeing as there's enough talk of resurrection to fill an entire Sunday sermon. However, I touched on that for my Lent-themed recap so I'm going a different direction for this one...

Easter Eggs! Step aside, Jesus, here comes commercialism!

So, what did the main characters in this episode get in their Easter baskets this year?

Little Ben
*New lease on life*
From: Richard
He gets a brief how-do-you-do from leader Widmore after he wakes up. Not much in way of a welcoming committee considering Widmore would have let him die, but he seems to have changed his mind when Richard reminds him of what Jacob/the Island wants.

Medium Ben
*Brand new baby*
From: Danielle
Interesting twist on how Alex was taken. Turns out he was sent to kill Danielle instead. And he had sympathy for her! Definitely a new, moral, side of Ben we've never seen. I also found it interesting that he warned her to run away from the whispers. Again, he knows a lot about what's happening on the island, but we don't get to see. Let us in, Ben. Let us in. By the way, they did a pretty good job of making him look younger, don’t you think? You'd almost think his voice was cracking. Oh, and was that Ethan with him? Interesting considering Ben's involvement with the others was kind of an accident to begin with.

Big Ben
*Small shotgun*
From: Caesar
Whoa, didn't see that coming. And here I was thinking Caesar was going to be a new, albeit minor, character. Not so much.

*Special hug*
From: Alex
Well, the monster didn't kill him, but it did deliver an ominous message in the end as Alex. "I know you're planning on killing Locke (again). And if you do, I will hunt you down and destroy you." Alrighty... clear enough. On top of that, she demands that he swears allegiance to Locke. Shazam!

Locke
*New pair of balls*
From: The Island
Not to be crude, but I think we can all agree that Locke spent a lot of Season One being a badass and Season Two through Four whining about answers and following Ben like a lost puppy. Have you ever seen the movie "How Stella Got Her Groove Back"? Me either... but I imagine if Stella was a white man in her late 50s on a crazy island, the movie would go a little something like last night's episode.

Sun
*Hope*
From: Christian
Though unfortunately, said "hope" is packaged in the form of a dead man. I wonder what she and Frank initially thought when Christian told them to sit tight and wait for John? Apparently they didn't have too much of a problem with it seeing as they were settling in for the long haul. One unspoken awkward moment for me was when John said to her how him being alive again was strange for him too, then added, "But don't worry, because I assure you I'm the same man you've always known." I'm sure she was thinking, "That's actually the part that worries me."

*A little truth*
From: Ben
The one true thing I think Ben said in the entire episode was in his brief conversation with Sun. "I've seen the island do a lot of miraculous things, but nothing like this. The fact that John Locke is alive and walking around scares the living hell out of me."

Frank
*A statue*
From: Ilana
So he can find out what exactly lies in its shadow. SERIOUSLY. What the hell was that about? He leaves for one day, maybe two, and suddenly the Ajira survivors are organized, armed, have secret pass phrases, are going places, and taking hostages...? What?

Widmore
*A one way ticket off the Island*
From: Ben
A lot of subtle reveals in their conversation. Once again, there is mention of "breaking the rules." One of which is frequently leaving the island, and another is having a child with an off-islander. To the first I will say this. We know from either Season 3 or 4 that Ben was going off the island quite regularly judging from his secret stash of fake passports and foreign currency. If that's a no-no, then Ben supposedly broke that rule plenty of times once he was in charge. Second, the fact that Charles had a child with someone other than an other seems to blow my theory that he shacked up with Ellie. I wonder if the same thing happened to her. She got knocked up by some off-islander and had Daniel, only to be banished, herself.

The more we learn of the others, the more they just seem like a kooky cult. They have say in who you can and can't be involved with (last night with Widmore), they collect dead bodies (Amy's first husband), they hang out in a super secret temple (with some other super secret temple buried beneath it), they participate in public trials and brand people (remember what they did to Juliet?), they answer to a chosen leader (who answers to Richard (who answers to Jacob (who answers to the Island))). Shall I go on?

Kooky.

Anyway, good episode. Looks like we might get an unexpected Miles episode next? That could be interesting.

S5E11 - Whatever Happened Happened

It’s a very special April Fools Day episode of LOST.

Young Ben is dead! Behold, the paradox is upon us!
APRIL FOOLS!
Ben isn’t dead. He can’t be. We know this. Though he isn’t exactly doing cartwheels either.

The confusion and potential pitfalls of time travel couldn’t have been better exemplified in the conversation between Miles and Hurley. I actually get everything that Miles was saying, as headachey as it all is. This is Ben’s past so he CAN’T die because we know he’s alive as an adult, but everyone else is experiencing it as their present so they can kick the bucket, no problem. The one thing Hurley did address that is a problem though, why doesn’t adult Ben remember meeting these people? Though kind of hokey, Richard actually hints at a potential explanation. More on that later.

Sawyer asked Kate to pull his finger before jumping out of the helicopter.
APRIL FOOLS!
He asked her to check up on his daughter Clementine once she was rescued. Yeah, we kind of all knew that, right?

No offense if you or someone you love is named Clementine, but geez… why would a parent do that to their child? The thing they left out, which I thought was a pretty significant realization, was Kate’s reaction once she found out that she had known Cassidy briefly before coming to the island. No big deal, but you’d think she’d at least be like, “Wow, small world” or something. Anyway, Cassidy smells her lie about being Aaron’s mom a mile away. I guess one develops a refined BS detector after shacking up with a con only to become one yourself.

All is well in Dharmaville and no one suspects any treason.
APRIL FOOLS!
There’s plenty of suspicion to go around, starting with all the new people.

Horace immediately jumps on the idea that busting out Sayid was an inside job. This is only supported by the open jail cell and “janitor keys” left behind. Sawyer immediately tells Miles to round up Jack, Kate, and Hurley to keep on eye on them.

Juliet is here to save the day!
APRIL FOOLS!
There’s a big difference between delivering a baby and suturing a bullet wound.

Juliet tells Sawyer she can’t fix it, only a real surgeon can. If only we knew one…

Jack is a lowly janitor.
APRIL FOOLS!
He’s a spinal surgeon.

We all know this, but no one else does. Talk about blowing your cover. There’s another good reason to not volunteer to save wee-Ben. Anyway, Jack is very on board with the whatever happened happened idea so believes Ben won’t/can’t die or just doesn’t care. That’s cold Jack. Cold. Kate decides she can’t just sit by and do nothing so volunteers to donate her blood.

SIDEBAR: I’ve tried to donate blood twice and nearly passed out twice. I have no problem with needles, but what I do have is veins the size of Texas and the ability to bleed out at twice the rate of a normal human being. A bit of a shock to the body to say the least.

The blood donation worked. Ben is stabilized. He grows up to be a very well-adjusted adult and everyone lives happily ever after.
APRIL FOOLS!
Only the others can save him. BUT AT WHAT PRICE?

Kate suggests that the others may be able to help. Juliet offers to come, but Kate says no, she’s got her life with Sawyer, blah, blah, blah. Actually, I thought this was very grown-up of her and I’m glad that they’re making her into something other than “the other woman.” She genuinely seems to wish them well and just wants to do what’s right.

Aaron was kidnapped in the grocery store.
APRIL FOOLS!
Kate’s just an inattentive mom.

Knock on wood. Don’t want to jinx myself, there. I can totally see my daughter haulin’ off in public one day and I have to make the walk of shame to the front after they announce the “lost child” over the intercom. Whatever happened to those elastic toddler leashes? They never really caught on, did they? That and Bird Flu. No one talks about that anymore either, but I’m sure it’s still around.

Sawyer rushed to help Kate because he’s still in love with her.
APRIL FOOLS!
He did it for Juliet.

Again, I’m happy to see the clean break with the Jack/Kate/Sawyer/Juliet love rectangle. Sawyer says he’s done a lot of growing up in the last three years and it shows. I really hope they keep him paired up with Juliet. They seem good together, though I’d still like to see how their initial three more weeks turned into three years.

“What’s up, Claire’s mom? Meet my son, Aaron.”
APRIL FOOLS!
“He’s your grandson.”

So we finally find out Kate’s real motivation for going back to the island and I must say, I’m impressed. Though I assumed it was because someone took Aaron and threatened horrible things unless she went back, it turns out to be a much more mature and altruistic reason. She has finally come to realize some of her motivation for claiming Aaron as her own was selfish and now she is determined to go back and find out what happened to Claire, his real mother. If I’m not careful, I might actually start to like Kate this season.

Richard agrees to heal Ben, free of charge.
APRIL FOOLS!
It will cost him HIS INNOCENCE. Mwa-hah-haaaah…

So, not only will he lose his innocence (which would certainly explain a lot of his actions as an adult), but Richard also mentioned he would lose all memory of this happening. I wonder if this is the reason why he doesn’t seem to remember the LOSTies as an adult. The temple’s “healing process” works some major voodoo on you, not only in a brainwashing sense, but also in the amnesia department. Like I said, a little hokey, but at least it may explain his lack of recollection.

The one other interesting thing that Richard said was in his interaction with one of the others who asked if he should consult with Ellie or Charles, to which he replied, “I don’t answer to either of them.” Apparently Charles is now leader of the others in 1977. It’s been about 20ish years since we saw him as a sixteen year old in the 1950s so that’s feasible. Also, if you remember, Ellie was the girl that took Faraday to defuse the bomb. So maybe Charles and Ellie are co-captains of the others crew. Perhaps more than just partners? What do we know of Penny’s mom? Nothing that I can recall. My prediction is that Ellie is Penny’s mom and something tragic happens to her later. Anyway, Richard’s comment that he doesn’t answer to them reinforces the weird hierarchy that we’ve known of all along. There are “the others”, but then there is Richard who seems to be among them, but not of them. Again, I’m sure the whole Jacob/Christian/Richard/(Charles/Ben/Locke) leadership hierarchy will be fleshed out at some point. For now, we’ll chalk that up on the to-be-answered side.

Adult Ben killed Locke.
APRIL FOOLS!
Locke is alive and well. Look out, Ben.

I liked the end. Definitely sets up a potential Ben-centric episode next. And if his expression was any indication, he did NOT expect Locke to be magically healed by the island. That and he probably crapped himself.

S5E10 - He's Our You

Don't drive too fast or you'll miss the sign. What sign, you ask? The sign that says:

"Welcome to Paradox Town"
Population: 0
Main Export: Craziness
Town Motto: "Whatever Happened Schmappened"
Sister City: Dharmaville

Egads! Definitely didn't see that coming. I knew that Sayid wasn't going to take Ben with him, simply because we know from Season 3 that Ben is supposed to remain with the Dharma Initiative well into his young adult life when he allows the Hostiles to infiltrate the barracks while he carts his dad up to a secluded part of the jungle and gasses him too.

The obvious question of course, does all of that still "happen" if young Ben truly is dead? Unless they're going to toss Faraday's blathering about the rules out the window, then young Ben's body is going to have to be discovered and resuscitated by the Dharma folks or the Island, itself, will have to "bring him back" just like it did Locke and presumably Jack's dad.

Whatever happened happened... unless you're Desmond because a different set of rules apply to him... oh yeah, and if you want to kill someone who is supposed to be alive in the future, then a third set of rules factor in... or if you wanted to travel to the day you were born and shoot yourself between the eyes, just for kicks, we've got you covered because then there's a FOURTH set of rules that absolutely CANNOT be broken... we're serious... unless you buy us a pizza... then we'll let you assassinate just about anybody you want.

What I'm really hoping is that young Ben will either naturally or miraculously survive the gunshot, because if he doesn't, in the immortal words of Ricky Ricardo, "You have some splain'in to do, Lucy."

Sorry for the long intro before the recap, but I just had to get that off my chest. I'll try to keep the rest short and sweet. Like the Sweet 16 of March Madness... (how's THAT for a transition?):

Here are the brackets.

ROUND 1:
Sawyer vs Sayid
This round goes to Sayid, hands down. He's not interested in the trumped up story that Sawyer has to offer and he ain't budgin'.

Adult Ben vs Widmore
Ben wins this one. Presumably the Russian was the last of Widmore's people that he wanted Sayid to kill and he's done with him, just like that.

Kate vs Jack
Jack knew about Sawyer and Juliet's relationship, but didn't share it with Kate. Big deal. She's supposedly over him anyway, right? Jack wins by unfair advantage.

ROUND 2:
Hurley vs Jack
But then Jack is immediately wiped out by Hurley in round two with Hurley's hilarious comment "They live together like not as roommates," followed by "I could totally see that coming."

Roger Linus (Ben's Dad) vs Sayid
I have to give this one to Sayid.
Roger: "You guys are supposed to be kings of the jungle and you got caught by these Dharma idiots?"
Sayid: "Yet you're the one mopping their floors."
BOOYAH!

Roger vs Young Ben
Roger then turns his anger towards an easier target, his own son. Victory for Roger, but a hollow one. I forgot how much Ben hated him.

ROUND 3:
Adult Ben vs Sayid
Ben tracks Sayid down and tries to convince him that Locke was murdered by Widmore's people in "retribution" for their past actions and that Hurley may be next if he does not "intervene." Sayid won't take the bait, but as we know he does actually bust Hurley out of the psych ward shortly after this, so we'll call it a draw.

Sawyer vs Sayid
Round three rematch between Sawyer and Sayid goes to Sawyer, but only because he was armed with a taser.

Oldham (Dharma torture guy) vs Sayid
Sayid finally eeks out a win this round. However, only on a technicality. For all intents and purposes, Oldham got the information he needed, it was just too crazy to be believed.

ROUND 4:
Kate vs Juliet
Not nearly the cat fight that the deviously edited preview had me believe. Strained civility, more like. Juliet is friendly, but still able to work the phrase "stay away" into conversation to make her point. Clever girl. Juliet wins. (Note: Juliet not only wins the conversation, but would have also won had it been a wrestling match, a spelling bee, or a best-hair competition.)

Everyone vs Sawyer
Sorry, Sawyer. You were outvoted. Sayid's goin' down.

Sayid vs Ilana
Sorry, Sayid. You were outsmarted. Nice boots, Ilana.

ROUND 5:
Sawyer vs Sayid
Final showdown between the two goes to Sayid who turns down Sawyer's offer of escape, saying he's there for a reason.

Sawyer vs Kate
Sawyer asks Kate about her own reasons for returning, but mum's the word. You win for now, Kate, but I'm sure we'll see your reasons soon enough, just as we saw Sayid's.

Sayid vs Jin
I wonder if Jin was really going to warn Sawyer over the radio or not. Either way, Sayid wins again.

FINAL ROUND:
Sayid vs Young Ben
We all know the outcome of this. Young Ben loses after a potentially fatal gunshot wound to the chest... or does he? For now, we are unsure of his fate. If he survives, the victory goes to him and Sayid loses. If he dies, EVERYONE loses because that, my friends, is a paradox. And when it comes to F-ing with time like that... nobody is a winner.

S5E9 - Namaste

Happy Belated St. Patrick’s Day…

If four-leaf clovers were turned into a rating system against which to measure episodes, I’d give this one two leaves. I don’t know, just kind of ho-hum, don’t you think?

Unfortunately, the only Irish-American actor in the cast, Terry O’Quinn (born Terrance Quinn), is not featured in this episode so I will have to assign an Irish alter-ego for the other characters…

Jack McShephard
If the island has a “reason” why everyone had to return, it has yet to show its hand. I feel like Jack, Kate, and Hurley were just dumped in the past and there’s a sense of, “Okay, now what?” Jack, of course, hopped on board the destiny train presumably to “protect” everyone, so must feel pretty out of sorts now that he’s back to see that everyone’s fine and dandy. Oh, and he’s now a janitor with a degree in spinal surgery. That probably sucks too.

Caitlin Austen
I thought for a moment that Juliet intentionally left Kate off the sub’s manifest. Who knows, she could have seriously considered it. Definitely potential for tension there. Kate must feel out of sorts too, but it seems like her main focus is to get Aaron back (if, presumably, that is why she decided to return).

Hugo “O’Hurley” Reyes
Same thing with Hurley. I feel like he and Kate, especially, are in a holding pattern motivation-wise until we find out why they decided to come back.

James Ford
(known to some LOSTies as “Sawyer”)
(known to the Dharma Initiative as “LaFleur”)
(known to his Irish mother as “Jimmy Flanagan”)
Sawyer had to think quick on his feet to slip his three friends in unnoticed. I thought it was especially harsh what he said to Jack about how when Jack was in charge a lot of people died. Anyway, I don’t blame Jack for showing up at his house with questions. Traveling back in time and living with the Dharma Initiative for three years definitely warrants at least a catch up chat. One of the most interesting things he mentioned in this episode was how Faraday was no longer with them. I’m looking forward to seeing what happened to him.

Sayid Fitzpatrick Jarrah
Unfortunately, Sawyer’s quick thinking couldn’t quite save Sayid, though he’s at least safe for now. I’m also assuming Sayid has figured out by now that they’re in the past, especially after meeting young Ben, which was perhaps the only surprise of the episode and one I kind of figured would come at some point anyway considering Ben grew up during the Dharma Initiative. Of course, the time travel again bothers me because surely Ben is old enough at that point to remember these people that he’s meeting. Then again Ben is very mysterious and deceptive so it wouldn’t surprise me if he has always remembered Sayid or any of the other LOSTies and has known all along that they were “destined” to be in his past/future.

Sun McKwon
So, it is confirmed that the rest of the plane survivors are indeed in “the present.” Which begs the question of why did only certain people go back in time, but for now I’ll chalk that up to the “unpredictability” that Eloise warned them of. Very funny when Sun finally knocked out Ben, which we knew would happen since we saw Locke discover him mixed in with all the other hurt or unconscious crash survivors. Good for her for not trusting him. But just what exactly is she supposed to do now? The picture Christian showed her bugs me. If I understand how time travel “works,” that picture should have been there since the 70s, therefore when some of the LOSTies followed Locke to live in the abandoned Dharma barracks, there were plenty of opportunities for someone to have seen it. Are we just to believe that no one happened to notice a picture with Jack, Kate, and Hurley hanging on a wall dated 1977? Sheesh. Anyway, I suppose Christian will help her travel through time to rejoin everyone? Double sheesh.

Not much else to say. Wasn’t wild about the episode to tell you the truth. Just sets up an awful lot of tension for Jack/Sawyer, Kate/Juliet, Sayid/Dharma and not to mention sets up whatever crazy stuff Sun/Frank will have to do to “go back” if that’s what they need to do.

Ho-hum.

S5E8 - LaFleur

There seemed to be a lot of good news/bad news in this episode so I shall recap in kind.

Good News:
Congrats, Losties… NO MORE TIME TRAVEL! Woohoo!
Bad News:
You’re stuck in the 1970s. Here’s your complimentary Steely Dan cassette tape. Enjoy.

Even though I am happy to report that Locke’s efforts unstuck the analogous “record of time”, the result is not much better as it pertains to potential problems. The Losties are now stuck in the past, meaning they could set off a chain of events that unwittingly alter their own histories. But, Daniel puts an overly simple spin on it saying, “Whatever happened, happened” meaning there’s nothing they can do to create a paradox because “time won’t allow it.” I’m saving myself the headache and just swallowing that whole.

Good News:
It’s a lovely day for a picnic.
Bad News:
It’s also a lovely day to shoot you and your husband.

Seriously, what’s up with that? So much for whatever “truce” agreement the others (aka Richard’s people) and the Dharma Initiative had. It seems to me that Richard’s men are the one’s that broke the truce. They shot chica’s husband and looked ready to do her the same. How is it that Richard’s people need “justice” when their men were the ones in the wrong? And, how is that taking her husband’s dead body makes them even?

Good News:
You’re sonic fence is great for keeping out unwanted people and critters.
Bad News:
It doesn’t work on zombies.

I’m not too far from kidding when I ask… Is Richard and Friends all zombies? Is that why the fence “doesn’t work” on them? Is that why he’s permanently young? Is that why they think it’s cool to collect dead bodies… to grow their zombie numbers? I mean, it’s not like death is permanent on the island anyway (ie.. Christian and Locke). Also, if the fence doesn’t work on them, then why did Richard have to “convince” young Ben back in the day to deactivate the fence so his people could come in and kill everyone? Did they up the ampage and that’s what did it? Oh yeah, AND if Richard and Friends truly are the “natives” then are they the ones responsible for building that gigantic four-toed statue (first seen at the end of Season Two and last seen last night). Anyway… WEIRD.

Good News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for two weeks to find our people.
Bad News:
Horace the security guy let us stay for three years to find our people.

Talk about commitment. Needless to say, I’m curious about how two weeks turned into three years. I mean, I understand that the O6 – Aaron + Locke + Ben just hadn’t showed up yet so they kept at it, but you’d think eventually they’d say, “Well, we tried,” and move on. I feel like there’s a lot of new potential flashback material in these past 3 years. Off the top of my head is Daniel’s to-be warning to little Charlotte about the island. It happened according to Charlotte and in Daniel’s own words, “What happened, happened,” so he obviously will warn her and the mother despite his weak mumbling at the beginning of this episode to the contrary.

Good News:
You’re a daddy.
Bad News:
You missed it.

This is the verbatim good news/bad news that Sawyer gave Horace. Again, I hope we get to see peeks into how everyone’s “relationship” with the Dharma Initiative developed over the past three years. Apparently Sawyer (aka Jim LaFleur, which I found hilarious), Miles, and Jin (speaking fluent English these days) work security detail. Daniel (who wasn’t around much this episode) apparently works construction and perhaps with the science team according to the brief clip of him we saw in the Orchid Station at the beginning of the season. And Juliet becomes a… wait for it… mechanic (a surprisingly far cry from my midwife idea).

Speaking of which, apparently whatever happened (or in this case will happen) to cause the pregnancy issues, hasn’t happened yet. The obvious question, just what will happen to cause that issue? Here’s an idea… HOW ABOUT THAT NUCLEAR BOMB YOU NUMBSKULLS BURIED? Radiation poisoning, anyone? Unfortunately, I bet it will have something to do with time travel. Maybe Daniel will do something funky at the Orchid Station to catapult the Losties back to the “present” when the Ajira flight landed and it lays a permanent pregger-voodoo on everyone in the past. Kind of like a benign version of the time sickness, except deadly to embryos.

Good News:
Jin found Jack and Hurley!
Bad News:
He also found Kate.

I guess we’ll find out if 3 years really is long enough to get over someone or not. Poor Juliet. She dug on Jack then backed off because she figured he liked Kate, then she off and develops a seemingly stable long-term relationship with Sawyer who—oops!—also maybe still digs on Kate. I mean, Kate’s easy on the eyes, but come on… looks AND personality…? Juliet, hands down.

Good News:
Eloise is a wiz at math…
Bad News:
Give or take 30 years…

I’m guessing that in the prior episode when Ilana and Caesar referred to the passengers like Hurley “disappearing” it was because they went back in time while everyone else on Ajira landed in “the present.” Fine. But why didn’t that happen to Locke, Ben, Frank, and maybe Sun? Can the island “choose” where/when people go based on what it wants? Lame-O. Even a watered-down Faraday analogy would be better than that. I hope we get one. Oh wait, maybe this was the “unpredictable” factor that Eloise warned would happen if ALL of them didn’t return. Aaron didn’t come with, nor did Walt or Desmond if they’re included in the mix. Perhaps them not being on the plane made the return go a little wonky and some folks wound up in the past instead of the present. Whatever. Even though time travel has stopped, its suckiness lingers on.

S5E7 - The Life And Death Of Jeremy Bentham

Ash Wednesday was yesterday, which marks the beginning of the 40 days of Lent, culminating on Easter Sunday. Rather than spending half of my recap offering a watered-down version of what that means, I’ll link you over to a more authoritative version for those of you not in the know: Lent (Wikipedia). Sufficed to say, it is in some ways about sacrifice and when coupled with the underlying Easter theme of new life and resurrection… well, you’ve got more religious symbolism than you can shake a stick at and I wouldn’t be doing my job if I overlooked such an obvious parallel between last night’s episode.

RESURRECTION
Locke’s alive! Confused, but alive. He’s special too, oh man is he special. Probably freakin’ tired of people telling him just how special he is.

ASHES
There was definitely a few ashes from the charred bits of the Ajira flight wreckage, though I must say, Frank the Pilot did a much better job of landing it all in one piece than the pilot of Oceanic 815. After last week’s episode, I wasn’t even sure that anyone except the O6 would be on the island, though I had a feeling that the man who we now know as Ceasar and Sayid’s marshal who we now know as Ilana would be around just because they had more than a good share of face time. Turns out the ENTIRE plane crash landed on the island! The twist…? The O6 apparently disappeared. Well, Jack, Kate, and Hurley, at least. The big question is, did Sayid or Sun disappear too? I think Ilana told John that the pilot and “some woman” took one of the boats. You would think Frank would most likely run off with Sun since they know more about what’s going on, but if that’s true, then the obvious question is why did they not “disappear” along with Jack, Kate, and Hurley? I won’t get too hung up on that just because it’s such an obvious question, I feel confident it will be answered (even though it may be a weak weirdo fantasy time-travel type of answer).

I liked the opening scene where Ceasar is rummaging through the presumed Dharma station they landed near. Does he know about the island and that is why he knew to arm himself with that shotgun he found? Or is he just trying to figure out wtf’s going on like any normal person would? And by “normal person,” I’m not including anyone from the original Oceanic flight 815, because Lord knows they next-to-never ask one single straight forward or obvious question. Or when they do, seem satisfied with vague crap answers.

ALMSGIVING
Widmore was doing more than his fair share of almsgiving in this episode. He seems ready to give every penny he can to the needy John Locke (aka Jeremy Bentham) in order to help him get back to the island and “protect it.” Big reveals… Widmore used to be the leader of the others! Ben ousted him! And apparently, there’s a war coming (also known as Season Six). Widmore hooks Locke up with the mouthy Abaddon as a driver who we’ve seen before. Apparently his job is to “get people where they need to go.” How’s that for a vague job description? Interesting, though, that he had a hand in John going on the walkabout, so I wonder if he had a hand in orchestrating anyone else being on that flight? Presumably one can calculate when/where a window to the island will open so all you have to do is make sure whoever you want stranded is on a specific flight. Remember the psychic in season one that told Claire she HAD to be on that flight? At first we thought it was because he wanted to make sure only she would raise Aaron since he was convinced she had to be the one. Well, in season 3 we found out via Mr. Eko’s flashback that the man was a fake so it’s not impossible that Abaddon approached him and paid or pressured him into convincing Claire to get on that flight. Anyway, the big question here: Do we believe/trust Widmore?

PENANCE
First up, Locke visits Sayid who is doing some humanitarian work in Santo Damingo. We still haven’t seen exactly why Sayid broke off with Ben and we may yet in future flashbacks, but it could just be that Sayid grew tired of simply killing people without good evidence as to why. Anyway, Sayid gives Locke a big fat “not interested” on his island invite. Can you blame him? Actually, can you blame any of them? Locke – 0/1.

Next up, he visits tall Walt who seems strangely casual for not having seen his father in three years. Was he going to invite Walt along then changed his mind or did he truly just want to check in on him? Is Walt supposed to go back too? Or Aaron or Desmond for that matter? Either way, the score is now: Locke – 0/2.

FASTING
Please don’t think me prejudiced when I say Hurley could benefit from a week or two of fasting. Seriously, that red robe—his permanent attire-of-choice while in the mental institution—not his most flattering outfit. It was pretty funny how he was okay with Locke being a hallucination then freaked out when he found out he was real. Hell no, he won’t go. Locke – 0/3.

PRAYER
As in, he didn’t have a prayer when it came to convincing Kate to tag along. She grills him about having never loved anyone which is why it was so easy for him to stay on the island. He says he did love someone, but was too angry and obsessed (with his father) for it to work out to which Kate replies in sad sarcasm, “Look how far you’ve come.” ZING! I’m surprised Locke didn’t drop dead right then after being cut by such an acute observation. Locke – 0/4.

Locke has Abaddon track down his old flame who passed away a few short years ago. At first, I thought maybe it was an elaborate hoax to convince him not to pursue her and potentially have a reason to not go back, but when Abaddon was shot, I began to think Widmore has been telling the truth the whole time. More on that later. Anyway, after wrecking in a mad dash to get away, Locke wakes up in a hospital with Jack by his side. Mention of Jack’s father gives him pause, though it melts into righteous anger. Locke – 0/5. (Though a little bit of conviction must have eeked through as we know Jack eventually changed his mind) Locke – 0.5/4.5.

SACRIFICE
Thinking he has completely failed, a dejected Locke is ready for the ultimate sacrifice, though it seemed more fueled by failure and depression rather than the idea that what he was doing might actually lead everyone back to the island. I think he was just done with it all. And who can blame him? In comes Ben at the last minute, spouting off yet again how special he is and how HE’S the one that’s been protecting everyone, and by this point you just don’t know who to trust. However, once Locke mistakenly gives up the name of Eloise Hawking, all go-team support flies out the window as Ben strangles him to death. Whoa. Didn’t see that coming. I’m assuming Ben also didn’t anticipate needing to bring his body along at that point nor did he dream it possible that Locke would be resurrected. Talk about an awkward reunion they’re about to have.

I think it’s safe to say at this point that the preverbal line in the sand has been drawn. Widmore / Ben. Well, that line’s been clearly drawn for a while now I guess, but it’s becoming more and more evident which side is the “good” side. I’m not ruling out there being some reasonable explanation why Ben has done what he’s done, but I’ve given up hope that he, himself, is acting out of unselfish motivations. It’s all about Ben getting what he wants and stopping at nothing to achieve it.

EASTER EGGS
I’m looking forward to discovering the hidden nuggets from the past of our new castaways. It seems for now, though, only Caesar and Ilana are the main ones (just like the main cast have always been a “stand-in” for the twenty or so other survivors that are roughing it out there somewhere.) Rose and Bernard must be confused as all get out without Daniel Faraday around to explain things.

S5E6 - 316

ON SECOND THOUGHT… DON’T SHOW ME THE MONEY
I want to start by saying I loved this episode, but it’s hard to say why. If you think about it, not that much happened. They all boarded a plane and woke up on the island. Done. Maybe it was what they DIDN’T show us that hooked me. First and foremost, the lack of time travel. Outside of a skosh there at the end, everything happened in real time. No skipping about. No bright flashes of light. No potential paradoxes. Just good old linear story-telling. Second, it was the missing details of everyone’s last day off the island that make you really wonder what happened to change their minds or force them on that flight. Anyway, on with the recap.

SHOUT OUT TO SEASON ONE
I really liked how the opening was a throw back to the pilot episode. Jack wakes up in the jungle in his suit, hears a commotion and runs blindly through the jungle. At first, I thought it was yet another classic LOST fake out where you think they’re on the island, but they’re not. But you know what happens when you make assumptions, right? Anyway, turns out Jack, Hurley, and Kate at least made it back. Cool beans.

THE LAMPPOST
46 hours earlier we are back at the church which turns out to be an off-island Dharma station used to track the island’s whereabouts… or shall I say whenabouts? Ha! Just a little time travel humor there. Eloise Hawking makes her spiel about how the lamppost works and how they need to recreate the crash as accurately as possible… yada yada yada. Best line of the night is when Ben claims he didn’t know the Lamppost existed and Jack asks Eloise if he’s telling the truth to which she replies, “Probably not.” I always chuckle when people slam Ben’s moral compass.

“THE ISLAND’S NOT DONE WITH YOU YET”
Talk about an ominous warning. Eloise tells Desmond his part in all this isn’t over, but he thinks otherwise. We’ll see about that, Dessy. And was it just me, or were you also waiting for him to get knocked out by that big pendulum?

DEARLY DEPARTED
Eloise has a one-on-one with Jack and drops two bombs. First up, she delivers Locke’s suicide note. This is our first clue into his death. Interesting. Second, she explains that part of the return is recreating the original crash as closely as possible, right down to the transportation of a dead body. Locke is essentially a substitute for Jack’s dead father and he must give Locke something of his dad’s. In a rare LOST moment, Jack asks the obvious question and says what the viewers are likely saying to their TV screens. “Why? That doesn’t make any sense.” But Eloise (likely speaking on behalf of the writers of the show) says, “It’s not about whether or not it makes sense, it’s whether or not you believe it will work.” TRANSLATION: “Hey, America, stop whining about how weird this show is getting and just enjoy the ride.”

JESUS AND PALS
Ben gives Jack a mini-sermon about Thomas the Apostle. Perhaps foreshadowing Locke’s resurrection in the upcoming episode? At any rate, Sun left with no explanation and Ben says he made a promise to an old friend and has some loose ends to tie up. Also, he seems pretty pissy about not being able to sit on his little pow-wow with Eloise. Sheesh… what a crybaby he’s become in the past two episodes.

GRANDPA SHEPHARD
Jack gets phoned that his grandpa has tried to escape from his retirement home. The man looks great for whatever age he’s supposed to be. Anyway, he conveniently has a pair of Christian’s shoes.

WTF?
Jack returns home only to find Kate in his bedroom. To me, the greatest mini-mystery they set up in this episode was Kate’s change of heart. What convinced Kate she needed to go back after being so adamant to the contrary? What happened to Aaron? It had to have been drastic for her to make Jack promise to never ask her about it. Wow.

NICE SHOES
Jack and Kate have a little “morning after” OJ. Kate notices his dad’s shoes and recommends a pair of hiking boots instead. Their conversation is interrupted by a phone call from Ben. He is at a pay phone at a marina and looking pretty bloody and distraught. Says he’s run into a little snag and needs Jack to pick up Locke’s body. Jack goes to the butcher shop where Locke is being held and switches out his shoes for his dad’s commenting the whole time how crazy it is. I couldn’t agree more. Here’s the part that I didn’t catch last night, but watching this section I missed really drove it home. Do we think that Ben’s “loose end” was to kill Penny? That certainly qualifies as a promise he made to an old friend, and by “promise” I mean “threat” and by “friend” I mean “mortal enemy.” I bet Desmond is the one that beat the crap out of him. Revenge is something that definitely would motivate Desmond to return to the island, though he swore he was done with it. Geez, Ben, that’s just… wrong! Hopefully that’s not what happened, but for now it fits the best.

ISLAND OR BUST
So, we finally see the airline that was mentioned a few episodes ago when Juliet saw the Ajira water bottle in that abandoned kayak. I’m still looking forward to that scene being replayed later on from the perspective of whoever was chasing and shooting at them. Anyway, Kate walks in as Jack is checking in Locke’s body. He runs into Sun, who says if there’s any possible way to see Jin again she has to try. About that time Sayid is escorted through security in handcuffs (a parallel to the original crash when Kate was the one in handcuffs.) Finally at the gate we see Hurley, who has bought up as many of the seats as he could in fear of what might happen to the other passengers. At the last minute, Ben rushes in, almost missing the flight (yet another shout out to the original Oceanic flight where Hurley was the one that nearly missed the plane).

“WE’RE NOT GOING TO GUAM, ARE WE?”
After the plane takes off, Jack goes to sit with Kate saying how crazy it is that they’re all “back together.” She makes the heavy comment, “Just because we’re on the same plane, doesn’t mean we’re ‘together.’” Ouch. The pilot makes an announcement and it is none other than Frank Lapidus, chopper pilot from the original freighter folks. Once he sees Jack and the others he makes the second best comment of the episode. No, Frank, you ain’t going to Guam.

“I WISH YOU HAD BELIEVED ME.”
Ben claims he didn’t know Locke committed suicide. I don’t think I’m alone when I say I don’t believe a single word out of Ben’s mouth these days. He let’s Jack read Locke’s suicide note in privacy. It’s both succinct and sad. Can’t wait for next week where it looks like we’ll get to see what really went down after he left the island.

DON’T COME A KNOCKIN’ IF THE PLANE’S A ROCKIN’
They hit some turbulence and pretty soon there’s that all-too-familiar flash of light and they wake up on the island. Or at least Jack, Kate, and Hurley for now. Surely Ben, Locke, and Sun made it back as well so we’ll see what’s up with them soon. For some reason, I had it in my mind that the O6 wouldn’t get back to the island until the end of this season. So, much to my surprise, they’re back with still half of the season left to play out. Also, I’m guessing Frank is probably along for the ride, not to mention the lady marshal accompanying Sayid plus that one guy that gave his condolences to Jack at the airport that they made a point to show over and over. Just like the freighter folks from last season, it’s always nice to introduce a few fresh faces and potential storylines. Not that we need more mysteries and backgrounds to dig through, but with only a season and a half left, it seems their introduction might be key to tying together some of the unresolved mysteries still out there.

WORKIN’ 9 TO 5
Jack, Kate, and Hurley find each other and guess who finds them…? Jin! Driving a beetle bus and sporting a Dharma jumpsuit no less. We know at some point that Daniel winds up in the Dharma timeline, helping build the orchid. Looks like Jin came along too and is working security detail. It will be funny if we later see Juliet working as a midwife and Sawyer scrubbing pots in the kitchen. Looks like the LOSTies left behind were stranded in the past for a bit and had to settle in for the long haul. I wonder how long they’ve been “waiting” for the O6 to get back? I wonder if they’ll have flashbacks to fill in the gaps between when Locke left and when the O6 returned. Interesting set up for the rest of the season.

Like I said before, the greatest part of this episode was the mini-mysteries behind everyone’s last day before returning to the island not to mention what Daniel, Jin, Sawyer, and Juliet have been up to. Things that obvious will surely be revealed and I’m beside myself with curiosity.

S5E5 - This Place Is Death

That's right kids, it's that time of the year again. So grab your spouse/partner/significant other/self and settle in for a very special edition of...

***LOST VALENTINES***

To: Robert
Card: Bright yellow card depicting a cartoon teddy bear.
Outside: "I've noticed something different about you lately. Have you been working out?" (pic of teddy bear flexing muscles) "Get a haircut?" (pic of teddy bear sporting a buzz cut) "Lose some weight?" (pic of skinny teddy bear) "Get possessed by an enigmatic creature comprised of some freakish semi-solid smoke-like substance?" (pic of teddy bear w/ horrified expression being dragged along the jungle floor)
Inside: "Either way... I'm going to shoot you." (pic of two teddy bears pointing rifles at one another)
From: Danielle

Wow. Well there goes the time sickness theory. I guess it makes sense that it was something else wrong with Rousseau's team because the time sickness seems to only cause forgetfulness on the light side, make your nose bleed on the medium side, and death on the heavy side. Apparently whatever effected her team "changed" them somehow. I'm assuming it made them "bad people," which is obviously the case if Robert was willing to kill his own wife and child at the end. And what's up with what he said? It's just a security system guarding the temple. Yeah, the First United Temple Of Make-You-Crazy.

Anyway, I'm happy we got to see this unanswered piece of Rousseau's background, though in typical LOST fashion it brings up more questions. I'm still mildly curious about how the others managed to kidnap baby Alex, but as far as I'm concerned Danielle Rousseau may now rest in peace.

To: The Island
Card: No card. Just the same message carved in trees, spelled out with rocks, and drawn on the beach, over and over...
Message: "I want to have your baby."
From: Locke

Here's my crazy theory. Remember way back when in season 1 when Locke actually saw the smoke monster for the first time? He told Jack he saw the "eye of the island and it was beautiful." Maybe that's brainwash talk for "The island told me to keep you here against your will and kill everyone else." Think about it, he was mildly crushing on the island before that encounter. And who could blame him, it healed his legs. But let's assess his behavior ever since then. In season 3, alone, he blew up the com station to allow outside communication, blew up the submarine that would have allowed Jack and Juliet to leave, and knifed Naomi in the back. And I have a feeling even though he's "friends" with his fellow LOSTies, he wouldn't be too hard pressed to kill any of them if they got in the way of whatever he believed to be his destiny.

What if that's what the "true" others are as well? People who've been exposed to the smoke monster or gone to this crazy temple? Remember that stewardess, Cindy, that randomly popped up on the prison island they took Jack, Kate, and Sawyer to at the beginning of season 3? She along with the kids were all going to watch Juliet's trial. She seemed to be sipping the Kool-Aid hard core... smoke-flavored Kool-Aid. It doesn't explain everything, I know, but it certainly would shed light on why some people (Richard, John, Ben) are so die-hard.

Okay, thanks for entertaining my whacked out ideas.

To: Daniel
Card: Black with white lettering.
Outside: "This place is death."
Inside: "Seriously."
From: Charlotte

Alright, so Charlotte was not my favorite character. Still, it was kind of sad to see her final moments. It was confirmed that Charlotte did, in fact, grow up on the island. Her mother was with the Dharma Initiative, but moved away. I wonder if along with creeping out little Charlotte, Future-Daniel also scares the crap out of Charlotte's mom which is why the woman decided to leave. We know that Daniel (will be) among the Dharma folks at some point in episodes-to-come since we saw him hanging out in the Orchid station of the past in this season's premiere. Her warning to Jin and the gang to not bring Sun back was creepy. As always, there are conflicting messages and you don't know who to believe. Ben/Richard/Christian say they all need to come back, Charlotte on her death bed says they shouldn't. I have the uneasy feeling that Charlotte is spot on.

To: Jack and Sun
Card: Homemade card made from colorful scraps of construction paper.
Outside: "I tried to think of the perfect gift for you this Valentine's..."
Inside: "And if you had ANY idea of how much effort I put into MAKING this $%#@! card you'd be ON YOUR KNEES kissing my feet."
From: Ben

Is it just me or was Ben being super pissy in the van? I guess if I blindly thought I was doing the right thing and going through who knows what to keep people safe, I'd be upset too if everyone wanted to kill me for it, but come on dude... chill. And I think he's way out of line to say how hard he's been working to keep all of their friend's safe. As if he even cares. He wants to get back to the island and just happens to need them in order to do it, is all.

To: Ben
Card: A simple rectangular card. About 3in x 7in. You know... the kind you typically get from your grandparents just before graduation and you're all like, "Sweet, they sent cash."
Outside: Pink with a red heart.
Inside: Hand written... "Sorry we can't be with you for Valentine's. Here's $20 for gas money or whatever. Best of luck."
From: Kate, Aaron, Sayid, and Hurley

So, Ben only has one-third of the Oceanic Six. The Oceanic Two. Just doesn't have the same ring to it, doest it? I wonder if Desmond is supposed to go as well. I never got the impression that he was supposed to go back too, but there he is with them all nonetheless. Ironically, Daniel asked Desmond to find his mom to help and that's what Ben's already doing. Seems like an elaborate plot device just to keep Desmond around. Whatever, though, I like ol' Dessy. It would just suck if he blips off to the island without Penny and little Charlie. I don't see that happening, though. At least not voluntarily.

To: Sun
Card: Plain white paper with crayon frowny face
Outside: "I miss you mommy."
Inside: Crudely drawn broken heart. "Please don't go."
From: Ji Yeon

Okay, so this is a sad Valentine, but seriously... it looks like Sun has all but packed her bags. Of course she still has a chance to back out of whatever they have to do to get back to the island in the next episode. I'm sure she wants to be reunited with Jin somethin' crazy, but geez lady, you've got a daughter to think about. I suppose she's under the naive impression that she can just waltz back to the island and pick up Jin on her way back to Korea. Yeah, right. Somehow I doubt getting back to the island will be as easy as running an errand, like the space-time equivalent of swinging by the grocery store for a jug of milk on your way home from work.

To: The Island
Card: Hastily folded piece of scrap paper handed to Christian Shepard seconds before moving the island yet again.
Outside: "Oh man, I'm so bad with these things. I'll just come out and say it. I'm leaving. I don't know for how long. It may sound cliche, but it's true when I tell you that it's not you... it's me. I truly want us to be together again. ALL of us. I'll be back as soon as I can. Dead or alive. I love you."
Inside: "P.S. I'm serious about wanting to have your baby. I'm so totally gaga for you. I would bear your children in a heartbeat if I were a woman, and it were possible to copulate with an inanimate land mass, and also if conceiving a child while on you wouldn't kill me by the third trimester."
From: Locke

So once again "the Island" speaks to Locke via Jack's dead father. It's funny how we're all so totally beyond this being strange. Anyway, Christian said the funniest thing of the episode and perhaps the truest thing since the very first season. "And since when has listening to Ben done you any good?" Bam! On a sidenote, I thought it was interesting he said he couldn't help Locke to the wheel. I guess that would make sense if he's for-real dead so is in fact a ghost. I'm not going there, though. It's difficult enough to swallow all the time travel stuff so I can't deal with ghosts. Not this season at least. Maybe next year I'll have to change the name of my blog from
http://timetravelsucks.blogspot.com/ to http://ihateghosts.blogspot.com/.

Apparently the Orchid's wheel had slipped off its axis, which may explain the time jumping. Locke just needed to give it a little nudge and voila, island moved and (presumably) time skipping halted. However, I have a bad feeling they're not out of the woods just yet. We don't know for sure where they are in time, but we do at least know they will be back in the Dharma's timeline at some point and eventually will make it back to their own (we assume), so the assumption is this temporal merry-go-round gone wrong has yet to be righted. Of course as we all know, the side effect of moving the island is leaving and never coming back. But then again that's only partially true. Apparently Mama Faraday (aka Elouise Hawking) is about to lay down some heavy physics mojo and get at least some of the gang back in the next episode or two. Will it be that easy? Somehow, I think not.

Anyway, I'm really looking forward to either the next episode or the next next episode where I bet we'll see all of Locke's post-island interactions with the O6 plus Ben plus Walt.

Happy V-Day to everyone. Your card is in the mail.

S5E4 - The Little Prince

LIFE IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES…
You never know what you’re going to get. Like a coconut chew, or a pecan cluster, or a Beretta 9mm semi-automatic. I’m not sure where Sun ordered that, but one thing’s for sure, it ain’t your grandma’s Whitman's sampler. Sufficed to say, she’s about to have a big throw down with Ben in the next episode.

DEOXYRIBONUCLEIC ACID
So Sun lends Kate a sharp looking lady suit and convinces her to have a sit down with the lawyer to see if she can have a face to face with his mystery client in exchange for a blood sample. The answser: No.

ORCHID BOUND
Locke tells Sawyer that the Orchid is where all of this started so the Orchid is where it will end. Not to mention he needs to get there so that he, too, can get off the island, convince the O6 to return, then die (for whatever reason). I wonder if Locke turning the Orchid wheel is what will finally put a stop to the time jumping since it’s what started it. Seems too easy. With everything else we learn in this episode concerning Ben, I wonder if Locke’s death is just an elaborate ruse to make it seem like people are out to hunt down the O6 when really it’s just Ben pulling people’s strings and trying to scare them into going back to the island. More support on this theory to come…

DON’T FORGET YOUR MEDS
Meanwhile some dude tries to tag Sayid with yet more horse tranquilizers, but fails miserably. In his pocket, the address of one Kate Austen. A worried Jack calls to meet with her. Okay, so knowing what we know about the lawyer’s “true” client, this is REALLY suspicious to me. Ben would do whatever he can to get the O6 back to the island, even if it means threatening them. The first set of folks that tracked Sayid and Hurley back to the “safe house” had tranquilizers too. Obviously, whoever sent them doesn’t want them dead. I’m sure Ben would be fine if he could just tranq everyone and haul their bodies back to the island on his own. Seems a little heavy-handed and obvious, but the only other person who could potentially be “after” them is Widmore and he seems more interested in getting Ben than them.

“REALLY BAD JET LAG”
That’s definitely going around this episode. We finally find out why the “time sickness” is only affecting Charlotte. The answer is, it’s not! It’s affecting everyone, depending on their length of exposure to the island. This piggy backs on what Charlotte said at the end of last season about looking for the place of her birth. She’s definitely spent some time here in the past. Later on we see Miles sporting a blood mustache of his own and Daniel asks him if he’s sure he’s never been on the island before. This lends heavy credence to the Miles-is-Marvin-Candles-baby theory. NEAT. I wonder if Dr. C ever got off the island at some point or if he’s buried along with his fellow Dharma buddies in that mass grave? Obviously his son made it off. Sure enough, third place for the Longest Exposure To The Island Award goes to Juliet, since her time as an “other” was at least a couple of years if I remember correctly. Next up, Sawyer and Locke, then only Daniel can save them all.

STALKER
So Jack meets Kate, they make a little small talk about his facial hair and then follow the lawyer to meet with his “client.” It turns out to be none other than Claire’s mother! That makes sense, right?

PSYCH!
No, not Claire’s mother. Apparently she’s there to collect her settlement from a lawsuit against Oceanic Airlines and has no clue that her grandson may still be alive.

AND THE CLIENT IS…
Ben. Of course. I’m giving myself $5 for an early prediction on that one. The thing is he seemed pretty straight forward when Kate finally called him out on that in the end. It’s certainly un-Ben-like to come clean so easily. I think he still has something up his sleeve. Also, apparently from his clandestine meeting with the lawyer in the parking lot, we are to believe that Hugo will be getting out of jail the next morning.

BOSOM BUDDIES?
Here’s my beef with all this. Sayid is adamant… ADAMANT… that Hurley not trust Ben and do the opposite of whatever he says. Obviously Sayid and Ben had a falling out between when we last saw him knocking folks off Ben’s list and the present day. Yet we are to believe that Ben claims to want to get Hurley safely out of jail and Sayid is just going to accept that and chauffer him around? Perhaps Sayid thinks the best way to protect Hurley is to watch Ben’s every move, but he seemed way too chummy for someone who distrusts the man as much as he claims. Surely we’ll see why Sayid hate’s him (again) soon.

“TIME TRAVEL IS A BITCH”
Too true… I couldn’t have said it better, myself, Sawyer. That was freakin’ hilarious. That and when they discovered the kayak washed up at their “old” campsite he said, “Who are these people? Other others?” I actually find that particular blip through time very interesting. We know that whenever they were, it was after the LOSTies set up camp, but it seems it was at some point “in the future” because no other boat washed ashore that we know of. So it was kind of an event that has yet to happen. Juliet said the logo on the water bottle left in the boat was from “Ajira Airlines.” Perhaps yet another plane crash that happens in the future? Was that who was chasing them in the other boat and shooting… survivors from another plane crash? Surely we’ll see who it was sometime down the line.

HEART TO HEART
Locke grills Sawyer on who he saw during their most recent time blip and he gets stonewalled. Later, when paddling the kayak, he admits to Juliet that he saw Kate. After dodging bullets and blipping away again, Juliet asks him why he didn’t speak to her and he says, “What’s done is done.” You can tell he’s heartbroken. All this is good therapy for the inevitable relationship he and Juliet will have. I can see it coming like a freight train.

THE KOREAN VERSION OF MICHAEL PHELPS
A life raft of Frenchies washes ashore, but just before they do they recover the body of none other than Jin Kwon, passed out on a rocky outcropping. Though I never bought in to his death, it was still a pleasant surprise to see him safe and sound-ish. One thing, though, just how far out did the effects of the island’s “move” reach? We know that the freighter disappeared because it was no longer there after the first flash of light. This means Jin had to have jumped clear and started swimming like a mad man in order to get close enough to be carried along. Whatever, though. He made it. Good enough for me.

DOUBLE-EDGED SWORD
Ahhh... time travel. You offer great things, such as the possibility to learn more of Rousseau’s backstory, yet I inherently hate you for it because you have to throw Jin in the mix, making it obvious that Rousseau should have remembered him sixteen years “later” when she meets him after his crash landing on the island. The only way I can see them explaining that away is that she essentially goes crazy after having to kill her team members (something I’m morbidly curious to see) then never having human contact outside of her kidnapped baby for over a decade and a half. That surely does a number on your mind.

To be fair, sixteen years ago I was a sophomore in high school so I’m not sure I would recognize one person that I had a chance encounter with either. Then again, I didn’t shipwreck onto a tropical island and find a near-dead Korean that had washed ashore. I don’t feel like I’m going out on a limb when I say that would be a memorable moment for anyone.

If I remember her story right, Rousseau explained all of the other members of her team “got sick” and she had to kill them. I could be remembering the she-killed-them part wrong and perhaps they just died of the sickness on their own. It seems likely that “the sickness” is the time sickness going around, but the French people aren’t jumping around in time, at least not yet. Curious…

Anyway, I’m just happy that we potentially get to see what really happened with her and her crew. Outside of Jin being confirmed alive, it was the best news of the episode.

S5E3 - Jughead

Not a bad episode. A few surprises and one unexpected answer to a question I didn’t even know I had. Though, of course, in typical LOST fashion it leads to more questions.

A jumbo sized H-bomb seemed to be the centerpiece of this episode so I shall recap the notable events countdown style:

10…

Ten people were “featured” in this episode. Daniel, Charlotte, Miles, Sawyer, Juliet, Locke, Desmond, Penny, Richard, and Widmore. (Sorry Oceanic Six plus Ben)

9…

They say a cat has nine lives. If that’s the case, it’s time to paint some whiskers on Richard Alpert because he’s been alive for who knows how long. I believe it was last season when we saw him attend the birth of John Locke and later on visit him as a young lad. The season before I believe featured young Ben in the Dharma camp visited by a same-looking Richard as well. My first theory was he is eternally young (or at least a very slow ager) due to some mystical effect of the island. But then of course they introduce time travel as if it’s as common as catching a cold and my thoughts went there. But last night when Locke asked, “Just how old is Richard, anyway?” Juliet answered, “Very old,” so that kind of puts me back on the fountain-of-youth train again. Not exactly an important point, but now it’s at least confirmed. That man is ancient.

8…

Also, is it just me, or is he sporting a heavy dose of “guy-liner” with a dash of “man-scara” for the eyelashes? He’s probably 88-years-old and just has a wicked awesome makeup crew. Maybe that’s who the “others” really are, Richard Alpert’s cosmetic team/security detail.

7…

Seven is the size of the leadership hat that Daniel reluctantly dons. Seriously, did you know that hat size is determined by your head circumference in inches measured ½ inch above your ears then divided by pi? Come on, admit it… you know you’re going to measure your head after you finish reading this.

Anyway, that leadership hat fits ol’ Danny quite nicely. He bluffs his way into Richard’s good graces and even claims his love for frigid, bloody-nosed Charlotte just before rushing off to defuse a bomb. I wonder, does the “time sickness” only affect certain people? Why her?

On the opposite side of the dashing hero coin is one Ms. Theresa Spencer, whom Desmond finds laid up in bed locked in a permanent state of brain time travel. Not cool, D-man… not cool.

6…

Big flash of light at the end and we’re somewhen else. The six non-others: Daniel, Charlotte, Miles, Sawyer, Juliet, and Locke are left standing in an open field, the make-shift military camp gone. Does anyone else think it’s funny that these six are supposed to be representative of at least twenty-ish other survivors like Rose and Bernard who are hanging out who knows where? I mean, I know it would cost a lot of money—plus get way crowded—to pay over two dozen actors to be in every shot, but it seems the only use for extras these days is to get killed. Sorry Frogurt. Sorry those two dudes that walked over the land mine tripwire. Miles did try to warn you.

5…

Five stands for fifty. “Fifty years from now, this island is still here and we’re all fine.” Okay, so that was crazy for Daniel to think the “other” chick would buy his logic, but either way, I’m a little disappointed in his recommended solution. BURY IT? I mean, you know the island is still around in 50 years, but who’s to say it isn’t leaking crazy amounts of radiation? And who’s to say that it won’t blow up in 50 years and two days? You’re a physicist for God’s sake… can’t you come up with a better idea than that? Anyway, I’m assuming that after the LOSTies all blipped off in time, it convinced Richard and gang that they were telling the truth so I bet they made like a bunny and hopped to it on burying that thing.

I don’t know why it struck me as so funny, but the best line of the night was when Sawyer “saved” Daniel and the girl asked, “Is he from the future, too?” and Sawyer said, “Ah man, you TOLD her?”

4…

Miles “senses” a freshly dug grave of four U.S. soldiers as he, Daniel, and Charlotte are marched back to the others camp. According to Richard, the US Army set up shop, Richard and his crew swooped in, asked them politely to leave, then killed them afterwards when they refused. This is very similar to what they do about a decade or so later when Dharma sets up their barracks and experiments. Infiltrate the camp, get Ben on their side, and then gas them to death. Geez, someone’s awfully territorial.

3…

Desmond plus Penny plus baby make three. Looks like they got down to business soon after their reunion because little “Charlie” looked to be maybe 2-ish. I assume he was named after the ex-rock star we all know and loved rather than his grandpa Charles.

It was touching how Desmond was willing to give up on finding Daniel’s mother so he could be free of the island for good and be with his family. Even more touching was Penny realizing he wouldn’t just “forget about it” and wanting to support him regardless. Lots of touching going on.

I’d say the Los Angeles address Widmore gave is further confirmation that the lady in the chapel speaking with Ben was, in fact, Mama Faraday.

2…

Two “military” people are captured and thanks to Juliet’s mad Latin skills, she confirms they are in fact, others. It’s interesting to me how the others seem to just scavenge and adapt to whatever comes their way. Everyone last night was wearing uniforms, carrying guns, and living in the abandoned army camp. Later when they push out Dharma, they start wearing nicer clothes and live in the barracks. Who knows what their living situation was before the army came. Many carried a bow and arrow when they captured D/C/M so one would think they were a little more savage until technology landed in their lap.

It’s fairly apparent that the others are the “hostiles” or “original inhabitants” that Marvin Candle has repeatedly referenced. However, my crazy theory is that Richard is one of the few “true” others. Everyone else just kind of seems along for the ride, as if maybe he recruited them at some point. Even Ben is a transplant, having come from off the island originally. And we know that he “recruited” a lot of people, such as Juliet, to join them albeit under shady pretenses.

I’m interested to know exactly how the leadership hierarchy of the island works. You’ve got Jacob, a ghost for all intents and purposes, presumably on top. Then you have Richard who seems to have some kind of contact or connection to Jacob, kind of like a VP. But instead of being the living-breathing representative of the island, he acts as a pseudo-liaison between Jacob and the “leader” who is selected through some bizarre process and doesn’t even need to be from the island. It’s more like the island chooses the leader and Richard just does the leg work. Makes about as much sense as the Electoral College.

1…

This brings me to the one question that was answered that I didn’t know I had. Charles Widmore was an other! To me, that was the biggest what-the-fo of the episode. I had always assumed that Widmore was just some rich dude that liked to fund experiments such as those orchestrated by the Dharma initiative and was super-pissed that Ben allowed them to be killed by the others, thus causing their mutual hate. But now that relationship is more complicated in my mind. If Widmore was an other, then perhaps he still was after Dharma was set up and then after Ben allowed the others to gas them all, Ben took over as leader of the others and thus was Widmore’s boss, so to speak.

0

KABOOM!! Any bets on if we’ll see that H-bomb again? My bet is it will show up next season, in a bad way. In an oh-crap-why-did-we-agree-to-bury-a-nuclear-warhead-in-our-backyard way.